Flipped
by sethsduck17
Summary: Jay's the homecoming king, Ellie's head cheerleader, Spinner's on the chess team, and Craig...is....gay? Guess who messed with Degrassi? ME! lol. And true to the show, there will be drama around every corner. So read on and review! FINISHED KIDDIES!
1. The First Day Back

Ch 1-The First Day Back

"Ellie!! We're gonna be late!" Ashley called up to her best friend.

"I'm coming!!" she said as she appeared at the top of the stairs. She was wearing her new Abercrombie and Fitch jeans and tight new light blue sweater. Her red hair hung loosely as she ascended the stairs to meet her friend.

"Wow. You look so great," Ash said.

"You're not so bad yourself," Ellie said as she breezed past her. Ashley looked down at her outfit and smiled. Her knee length jean skirt, off the shoulder green long sleeve t-shirt and black knee high boots. It was the first day back after Christmas break. They were going to rule the school; again.

"Hey Toby," Craig said shyly as he passed by the high school basketball star. Toby was one of the most popular guys in school. All the girls wanted to be with him and all the guys wanted to be him.

"Hey Craig," Toby replied as he slung his arm around Liberty. Craig just rolled his eyes as he walked away. He didn't know what he saw in that slut anyways. Half the school had already slept with her; those that hadn't were the girls. In fact, Craig was probably one of the few guys that wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole…even if he was straight.

"Looking good Em," Sean called out sarcastically.

"Fuck off!!" she yelled back as she adjusted her black fishnets. Sean Cameron. The person that she hated almost more than JT. Sean was a man whore…the exact same as Liberty Van Zandt, only a guy. He loved to poke fun at Emma and try to get in her pants. She sighed as she adjusted her black skirt and tucked her blond hair behind her ears. Another day at Degrassi Community School…another day in hell.

"Watch where you're going geek!" Jimmy called out to Alex as she accidentally brushed by him on her way into the school. Manny Santos, his girlfriend of one year, just laughed with him and made fun of the poor girl.

"Take your nose out of a book prude!" she yelled after her. Jimmy looked at her and then started to kiss her deeply as he pushed her against his car.

"Get a room!" Marco muttered as he skated by.

"Careful they might steal your board," Jay said to his friend as he walked into the school.

"I dunno, I kinda like your little gold crown instead," Jimmy shot back, referring to Jay's status as homecoming king.

"Baby that is so cheap. I mean that crown is plastic," Manny whispered loud enough to Jay to hear.

"Honey, the only thing that is cheap around here…is you," Marco called back and then ran when he saw Jimmy stand up.

"Paige, time to go!" her mom called to her.

"Fine," she sighed as she pulled on a sweatshirt. She picked up her bag and headed to the car. Degrassi Community School, where everyone is someone…what a joke. Paige Michaelchuck had been there for five years, seeing as how the school's combined, and she was a nobody. Sure Gavin, JT, Hazel and Alex talked to her…but as for friends…she had none. She had no one to confide in. No one to hang out with. She was alone and she hated it.

"Guys, this place reeks!" Hazel complained as she walked to school with Gavin and JT.

"It smells fine to me," JT replied.

"Oh my God, you can't smell that? Seriously, people need to stop driving so many cars. I can smell all the pollution from here!"

"Shut up!" they both said in unison as they walked away.

"I don't know if I'm ready for this," JT said as the school came into sight.

"What's the worst that could happen?" Gavin asked.

"Well…Alex could still hate me. I can't keep seeing her day after day and know that she hates me!"

"She doesn't hate you! You guys broke up yeah, but she doesn't hate you!" Gavin insisted.

"She does too," JT mumbled back.

"Right. Well I won't be at lunch today. The Chess Club has their first meeting and I'm so psyched. I've been practicing all break and I think I've learned some more moves…God I wish I could talk to them," he said quietly as Ellie and Ashley walked past laughing.

"At least they don't hate you like Alex does me," JT said again. Gavin just sighed and kept walking straight ahead.


	2. Background Info

a/n: ok so some of y'all said that descriptions of the characters would be nice. Sorry that this won't be a real chapter, but I'm going to do this anyways. I also need some ideas for this story if people would be so kind to contribute!! Ihave a small idea of where this is going…I just wanted to do this b/c I thought it would be fun

Gavin Mason- is a chess nerd and is Toby's persona

Paige Michaelchuck- is a social outcast and is nobody's persona

Jimmy Brooks- is a gang member and is Jay's persona

Hazel Auden- is an environmental crusader and is Emma's persona

JT Yorke- is down and out, absorbed in his problems and can only find the light sometimes. That's right, he's Ashley's persona

Toby Issacs- is a basketball star and one of the most popular guys at Degrassi and is Jimmy's persona

Emma Nelson- is a little freak/goth/punk princess and is Ellie's persona. I'm thinking a/b maybe mixing her and Ellie up a little bit, like incorporating both…not sure yet

Manny Santos- is a gang member as well and is Alex's persona

Sean Cameron- is a manwhore who slept with about half the school and is, of course, Craig's persona

Ellie Nash- is one of the most popular girls at Degrassi and is head cheerleader. If you haven't guessed yet, she is Paige's persona

Craig Manning- is kind of shy, and is gay. He is taking on Marco's persona (without Dylan that is)

Ashley Kerwin- Ellie's right hand girl, one of the top cheerleaders and is Hazel's persona

Jay- is the homecoming king and is nobody's persona. I just thought that would be fun

Alex- is a scholastic nerd who needs a life. Yep, that would be Liberty calling out there

Marco Del Rossi- is a skater who kind of thinks he has it made a little bit and is Spinner's persona

Liberty Van Zandt- can't keep her pants on, much like Manny can't


	3. Getting Snubbed

a/n: ok well to answer Merry-Brisnell, no I don't hate women. I am one…it's just I think Manny is a skank. Therefore, since Liberty is taking on Manny's persona, Liberty gets to be the skank. I'm sorry if you don't like me using that word, but that's just how I feel. As for the anonymous reviewer Kate, JT is supposed to be Ashley and Spinner is supposed to be Toby.Nobody has the JT persona though. As for the JT and Alex relationship, I might surprise you. Well…after this chapter, you might get where I'm going with this. Thank you all for your reviews!! Keep it up!!!

Ch 2- Getting Snubbed

Paige walked to her locker and sighed. She had been there for what, like fifteen minutes, and she had already been pushed into a locker and had received the ever popular apology in the form of 'oh sorry, didn't see you' when she in fact was standing right in front of them. She twirled the lock and the locker popped open, hitting Hazel in the face.

"Oh my God I am so sorry!!" Paige exclaimed.

"Ow," Hazel muttered as she rubbed her nose and forehead. "It's ok…I always wanted a make over," she joked.

"I am so sorry," she repeated worriedly.

"Paige, it's ok! See, no blood."

"Yeah but now everyone saw me smack you in the face with the locker and they're gonna think that I did it on purpose. It's totally going to destroy my chances of making friends this year," Paige sighed.

"I think you have plenty of friends. I mean _we_ love you Paige."

"Right, like four friends is the perfect amount," she continued to complain. Hazel sighed as she walked her friend. Sure, Paige didn't have that many friends, but Hazel had just about the same amount. Only she was perfectly fine with it and she couldn't understand why Paige was always looking for more.

"Hey Ellie…" Gavin ventured.

"Hey Gav," she responded as she kept walking. Gav, she had given him a nickname. He was on cloud nine…Ellie Nash had not only talked to him and knew his name; but a nickname.

"Hey Gavin," Alex said as she sidled up to him as he walked to homeroom.

"Alex, Ellie talked to me!" he whispered excitedly.

"Yay, queen bitch says hello," she muttered sarcastically.

"What is your problem with her? She is not a bitch! She's sweet and nice and popular…not to mention gorgeous."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever," Alex muttered again as she started walking faster past him. God, he liked Ellie Nash, the most popular girl at school. He never saw her, never saw all the things that Alex tried to do for him. She was just a friend, never anything more. Well this year would be different. It was a new year and a new year means new opportunities. Sure she had broken up with JT almost a month ago after going out for six months, but Gavin was the one she really wanted. And Gavin would be the one that she would get.

"Hey Libby," Sean called as he saw her in the hallway.

"Sean. Hey." She turned to look at him and then kept walking. Liberty and Sean had been together for a little while and things had happened. Yes, she still had feelings for him, but he had hurt her one too many times. Now here he was trying to worm his way back into her heart. Well she wasn't having it. Not this year, not this time.

"I tried to call you over the break," he said coming up to her.

"So you were the one that kept calling in the middle of the night. Look, you can't call me that late. In fact, why are you calling me?"

"Libby…what are you saying? I thought you and me were…agreed," he said finally.

"The only thing I agreed with you on is that you were an ass. Wait, are an ass," she corrected herself.

"I said I was sorry about that!!" he exclaimed as he again apologized for cheating on her with some out of town girl.

"Whatever. Look I have to go…can't be late on the first day," she replied ducking into a classroom.

"Liberty!! Can we just talk??" he yelled into the room. All he got back was her back and several heads turning in his direction. He just sighed and walked away. He loved her, he realized that one over the break. Sean knew that she loved him back, she just didn't know it yet. He smiled smugly as he chewed on that thought and walked away.

Craig grimaced and slumped down in his seat. He had just arrived in the classroom and found out that the teacher had arranged seating. And his favorite person in the world was sitting next to him; Jimmy Brooks. Jimmy found out he was gay with the rest of the school, only he didn't let it go like everyone else had. Marco had harassed him for a little while about it, but eventually even he grew to accept it. Now Jimmy just seemed to think that being gay was contagious, and he made a show of it.

"Hey queer," he said as he plopped down in his seat next to him.

"Hey…Jimmy."

So far so good. Craig decided to try to stop his antics right then and there.

"Hey Jimmy, can I ask you something?"

"Woah. Listen first off, I don't go your way. Second, I have a girlfriend…GIRLfriend," he said emphasizing the word 'girl' and also saying it loud enough for half the class to hear. They in turn giggled and then started the whisper trend and Craig just turned beet red and again slumped in his seat. Yeah, that went well.

"Mr. Dyscala? Would it possible if I could…switch seats with someone?" Craig asked the teacher quietly as the teacher walked in.

"You are??" the teacher responded.

"Craig Manning, sir."

"Right, Craig. This isn't middle school. You take the seat you have, end of conversation."

Craig sighed as he walked back to his seat. He should have known better…Marco had him last term and wouldn't let him switch either. Granted Marco just wanted to sit near Hazel, but still. This would be a long semester, that's for sure.


	4. the conflict

a/n: wow!! You guys totally rock at reviewing!! Thank you so much!! As for spalex…I don't know if that's gonna happen yet…haven't decided. Sorry Unwanted Souless Freak…hope I didn't disappoint you.

Ch 3- The Conflict

"Hey you!" Ellie said cheerfully as she wrapped her arms around her boyfriend.

"Hey baby," he responded as he turned and pulled her down in his lap. She kissed him and then turned to her friends.

"Hey Craig, you ok?" she asked as she saw him eye Toby a hint of venom.

"What? No! No, I'm fine," he stammered. Ellie was one of his best friends, but her boyfriend was something else. Yeah Toby was like, drool worthy, but was really ass worthy too. Craig also didn't exactly get along with Toby either. In fact, it was just that morning that he saw his best friends boyfriend flirting with Liberty. Now the conflict was to tell Ellie or just let it go.

"Craig! What's goin' on buddy?" Toby asked laughing.

"Huh?" he asked suddenly brought back to lunch.

"Got something on your mind? Wait-is it a guy?" Ellie gasped excitedly.

"Yeah, that's it," he said as he smiled weakly. He looked at the football player and Toby just smirked at him. He knew that Craig saw him that morning, hell he said hi to him! He also knew Craig wouldn't say anything to the beautiful red head. For one, Toby and his friends would pound the queer. Second, Craig wouldn't want to make Ellie cry. Craig also knew all this and spent the rest of lunch picking at his food and making half hearted attempts to join the conversation. _I am so screwed_ he thought to himself as he grimaced.

"I know you just got back from vacation and these are new classes, but I want to outline your project and assign partners," Emma's English teacher said. The whole class groaned as the teacher started talking about researching religions. Emma quickly scanned the class to see if anyone would be workable as a partner. There was Alex, who was defiantly scholastically inclined, Manny, who was sleeping, and JT, who was staring at Alex. _Great I'm alone_ she thought.

"Emma?" the teacher called out. Emma snapped out of her trance and raised her hand. "You will be paired with…" the teacher paused as she searched for the name.

_Alex, Alex, Alex…_ the blonde thought incessantly.

"Jay Hobart."

_This whole day has gone the shitter._ Emma looked at her partner slowly as he looked at her.

_Great, what is she a friggen vampire?_ He thought to himself as he took in her black outfit with black fishnet stockings and dark makeup. They both looked at each other for a minute before turning away. _Yep, this day has gone down the shitter_ he thought to himself as he sighed and wiped his sandy blonde hair out of his eyes.

"So you're stuck with pretty boy?" Jimmy asked Emma. Emma nodded silently as he blew the smoke from her cigarette out of her mouth.

"Just be careful. He might try to dress you up and take you to dances!" Manny mocked in a high pitched junior high voice.

"Over my dead body," she muttered as Jimmy laughed. Emma had been going out with his best friend Ryan when they all met, about two years ago. Well Ryan had to move and Jimmy promised to look out for her. Of course in those two years, both Emma and Ryan had moved on, but Jimmy had been with her so long that he couldn't find it in himself to just up and leave her. Even though he rolled in the "psycho-fucked-up crew" and almost everyone kept a five mile radius, Jimmy Brooks actually had the organ that felt things. AKA- a heart. Emma Nelson was like family and he would do anything for that girl…and Manny too of course.

"All I have to say is if pretty boy touches you," he warned.

"You'll kick his ass," Manny and Emma said in unison rolling their eyes.

"If she doesn't do it first. I mean she can hold her own Jim. Plus- she's picking up lessons from me," Manny said as she slung an arm around her friend. Emma stubbed out her cigarette out and chucked it far as the bell rang. Manny spritzed her and popped a mint as the two walked to class, Jimmy going to his.

"So you're sure he's cheating on her?" Marco asked his friend later that afternoon.

"Well, not sure exactly…"

Marco just looked at his friend. "I mean they didn't kiss or anything. They just looked really comfortable holding hands and arms wrapped around each other and shit."

"Craig, it was Liberty, she has the special ability to look comfortable with any guy," Marco said to his curly haired friend. Craig just looked the other way and shrugged uncomfortably. "Look, is it really bothering you?"

"Kinda! Ellie's my best friend man. And then I saw her ass of a boyfriend all up on some other girl," Craig said in a loud voice.

"Keep it down!" Marco hissed at him. "You don't know anything for certain. I wouldn't say anything until you see them playing tongue hockey."

"I guess," he sighed.

"Just keep it on the down low dude," Marco said patting his shoulder. All the sudden a blonde girl brushed past him, head down, hair pulled back in a pony tail, sweatshirt covering her.

"Who was that?" he asked. Craig just shrugged, not really paying attention to his friend.

"Well I'll catch you later," he said as he took off after the quiet girl.

"Hey!! Blonde girl!!" he yelled as he attempted to jog after her. Yeah, Marco was real suave with the ladies.

"Craig?" a girl asked from behind.

"Hey Ash," he responded. He knew the sound of her voice by now…they had been friends for a while.

"Is that true?" she asked quietly.

"What?"

"About Toby."

Craig whirled around to look at her. "You were listening!?" he asked.

"Well it was kinda hard not to. I was right behind you."

Craig just shot his friend a look that ensued the message she was eavesdropping on purpose.

"We have the same class together!" she exclaimed.

"Oh…right. Well it's not like I saw anything. I mean they could have just been giving hugs…"

"Right. Liberty gives hugs? Liberty gives hugs that involve tongues ok?" she retorted.

"Ashley…come on. I didn't see anything. You obviously heard what I did."

"Yeah I did. And I know that Ellie would want to hear it. So if she's your best friend than you need to say something to her," she said.

"No! It would totally break her heart!"

"Yeah. But think of how pissed she would get if she found out you knew. Look, let me make it simple. You say something…or I do," she said as she walked away.


	5. things may be different than it seems

Ch 4- Things May Be Different Than It Seems

"Hey blonde girl!" the boy yelled running after Paige. The girl just lifted her head and saw millions of other blonde girls and kept walking. Marco Del Rossi yelling at her? Yeah right…that's a joke.

"Hey," he said grabbing her arm.

"Oh! What's…up?" she said awkwardly.

"Umm…you're Paige right?"

She just nodded her head affirmatively. "So I was thinking…what are you doing tonight?"

_Oh my Lord Marco Del Rossi is asking me out?? No, that can't be it…he's just messing with me. Hazel probably paid him…I will kill her!!!_ She thought to herself.

"Cool. So I'll see you at seven. Dress warm," he said as he walked away.

"Ok…" she said as he walked away.

"What the hell was that?" Hazel snapped as she walked over to her friend. Everyone that environmental crusader Hazel Auden had a huge thing for the skater.

"I don't know," Paige said, dazed.

"Well it better be nothing! I swear Paige…" Hazel rambled on as Paige tuned her out. For once in her life, Paige might actually be noticed. Hazel could kiss her ass.

Ellie tossed her ponytail to the side and leaned down over her textbook. She had to do better on this next test…if she didn't, she could quite possibly fail! And if she failed, than that meant no Spirit Squad. That just could not happen, she was head of the Spirit Squad!!

"Hey…El…" Craig said as he came near her.

"Craig! Hey, what's going on?" she said happily.

"So…have you seen Liberty lately?"

"Liberty? Why? Are you trying to become straight? If you are, don't do it with her…not the right choice," she joked.

"No! Ellie come on," he started.

"Yeah…you would never be interested in her…" she mused to herself.

Craig just looked at her and shook his head. She was so gorgeous and she had no idea. If he was straight, he'd make a bee line right for her…_if_ he was straight.

"It's about Toby…"

"Is he ok?" she asked concerned. She looked up immediately, her brow furrowing. She was so in love with him…God he should kill that bastard!!

"Actually…it's more along the lines of _what_ he's doing."

She cocked her head at him, her bangs falling in her eyes. "What's he doing?" she asked cautiously.

"Being the best, most romantic boyfriend ever!" he crowed out from behind as they both whipped around.

"Yeah, that's it," Craig muttered to himself as he looked down at the floor.

"What have you been doing?" she asked him, remembering what Craig was saying.

"Just been getting tickets to Riverdance and reservations for after at only the most expensive place in Toronto!"

"Riverdance?!" she asked excitedly.

He nodded while she jumped up and hugged him. Ellie loved the Irish show, something about watching all those feet moving at the same time just hypnotized her. Plus, all those guys moving and kicking their legs that high…she wouldn't mind taking one home to mom. She just wouldn't let Toby find out…

"I know I was wrong

I just can't pretend that everything is ok again

I miss you

I miss your touch

Your kiss

I'm sorry I messed up

But please baby just take me back…" JT sang to himself as he sat in the music room at school. _Well if that didn't just suck_ he thought to himself. No one knew he would sit in here and write out his feelings. They didn't know he could sing…they just thought he was an ass. He messed up…he had gotten drunk and fooled around with Liberty when he was still with Alex. But hey, when you're drunk, even Liberty looks good! He had to get Alex back…if it was the last thing he did…he would get her back.

Alex sat and watched Gavin move the chess piece. He was a chess geek…but a cute chess geek which made it a-ok in her book. She watched him smile in triumph as he won that match and walked over to him.

"Good job Gav!" she exclaimed.

"Thanks Alex!" he said happily. "Wait, how did you know I won?" he asked.

"Oh!! I was…just passing by…and I saw…" she said pulling the lie out of her butt.

He just nodded his head. "Have you seen Ellie today?" he then asked her.

Alex just gave a sigh of frustration. "Look Gavin, get over her. She has a boyfriend! The only reason _she_ talks to _you_ is because you keep hounding her. Face it, we run in two different crowds. She feels sorry for you, just like other people do. Besides, why would you think she would even want to go out with you?" she yelled as she stalked off. God she was a bitch, she knew that. But right now, she didn't care. It felt good to tell him that. Ellie Nash was a stuck up, prude princess who would never spend the time of day with anyone like Gavin Mason. She practically avoided Alex and she was her friend. So if she can't deal with her, how would she be able to put up with him? Exactly, she couldn't.

"Hey Liberty, what are you doing tonight?" a guys voice said from behind her. "Or should I say, _who_ are you doing tonight?" he asked again as he walked away laughing with his friend.

"That's her…she's the one that ruined JT and Alex…" a few girls by the lockers said to each other. They would though…JT's friends. Before this whole breakup thing, he was actually pretty popular. He was the center of attention usually with his writing and all. Now people just avoided him and called him no fun. At least now he's not…but that night at the party…that was a different story. She looked at the girls by the locker and shot them a nasty look to where they shut up. However as soon as she passed by again though…the whispers started again. It seemed to be everywhere…people looking at her. Talking about her. There had to be about five different rumors going around school right now. God she hated it. Liberty had only messed with JT because she thought him and Alex had broken up. She didn't like him though…God no. He was just something fun to pass the time. She looked up and saw Sean coming her way and ducked into the bathroom. He would not leave her alone, no matter how much she begged him, he would not. Why couldn't he just understand that she didn't want to talk to him??

"Libby?? I know you're in here!" Sean said as he walked into the bathroom.

"Sean, what are you doing?" she sighed.

"What are you doing tonight?" he asked her instead of answering the question.

"Going out."

"With who?"

"A guy," she said.

"Wow! Really, that's so great to know," he said snidely.

"Fuck you," she said.

"You already did that sweetie. Now why won't you talk to me?"

"Because I don't want to!" she yelled as she tried to brush past him.

"I'm not done with you yet!" he yelled back as he grabbed her arm.

"Sean…let go! You're hurting me!!" she cried as his fingers started to turn red around her skin.

"You are not going out with anyone but me," he said as he let her go. She went flying back into the wall of one of the bathroom stalls and just sat there and cried.

a/n: so I know that Craig would never do that to Manny. I guess I decided to kind of abandon the persona's a little bit. I mean they'll still be generally the same characters as I had them laid out…just with some adjustments I guess. You guys rock at reviewing!!!!


	6. first and last dates

Ch 5- First and Last Dates

Paige paced her front porch nervously. Marco said he'd be by at 7 and it was already 6:50. 10 more minutes and she'd be associated with the "cool kids"…  
"Hey."  
Paige turned and saw him walking up the driveway.  
"Hi."  
"Wow…you look great…"he said just staring at her. She blushed immensely. She had worn her hair down, curled at the ends, actually put on makeup and was wearing some jeans she hadn't worn in ages that fit her perfectly and a quasi-tight top. Something she probably wouldn't be caught dead in at school.  
"Thanks," she replied softly.  
"So…let's go," he said as he led her to the car. She smiled nervously as she got in.  
"Relax, it's gonna be great," he reassured her smiling.

"Sit…here," Craig said pulling out a chair.  
"Why are you doing this? To make me miserable? He said he wasn't cheating and frankly, I don't know why you would accuse him of that."  
"Trust me, making you miserable is not _my_ job," he muttered.  
"What is going on?" she finally sighed.  
Craig looked around quickly and found his target.  
"Look," he said subtlety pointing in the direction of the movies. Ellie turned her head to see and saw Toby was there hugging onto a brunette named Haylie Lightmen.  
"So? I hug other guys too," she said a little impatiently.  
"Yeah, you do. But not like that you don't," he replied.  
She raised her eyes and froze. There was her boyfriend of eight months playing tonsil hockey.  
"Oh my God," she whispered, eyes filling with tears.  
"Ellie, I am so sorry…" Craig trailed off.  
The redhead swiped at her eyes, which were now hard and stood up.  
"El?" he asked surprised by her action. She didn't say anything, just started walking towards her boyfriend.  
"Oh Lord. Please don't do that…oh I'm gonna die," he said when he realized she wasn't listening. Toby saw Ellie coming at him and looked beyond her at Craig. Craig, in response raised his hand and smiled nervously by means of hello. Then he groaned and sank slowly in his chair.

"Hey," Marco addressed the group at large.  
"Hey," Ash replied back.  
"What's going on?" Paige ventured, seeing everyone staring at Ellie and Toby.  
"Ellie's finally getting rid of him," Jay spoke up. Ash finally turned around to look at Paige.  
"Who are you?"  
"Don't worry – I brought her. Paige's cool," Marco cut in quickly.  
"Half the girls you think are cool are bitchy," Sean said. Paige's face fell at that.  
"I'm sure you're different though," Ashley reassured her in a snide way that implied she didn't like the blonde. Paige just sighed and found a seat next to Jay and sat down.  
"Hey," she tried again with Jay. She was going to have fun tonight…first time with the popular kids and she would not go down in flames.  
"Hey," he said back. "How do you know Marco?"  
"Umm…well he just sorta approached me in the hall a today…"  
Jay just smiled in response. "Don't take this hard, I'm sure you're really nice, but it isn't gonna last. The last time he pulled a girl outa the hallway, it only last a week or two. It's like Sean in training," he laughed.  
"Yeah…"she tried to laugh along but inside her stomach was turning into knots. So far, a fire had started and she was dangerously close to falling in.

"Hey!" Ellie greeted her boyfriend brightly.  
"Hey El…"  
"So what's going on??" she asked wrapping an arm around him.  
"Not much. This is…my cousin. Yeah she's my cousin Haylie."  
Haylie just gave him a look. "Hey Ellie."  
"Hey Haylie. I didn't know that you guys were cousins…we have a class together!"  
"What?" he asked alarmed.  
"Yeah, World History right?" Ellie asked the girl. Haylie just nodded in response. "So what were the nights plans?"  
"Oh…not much. Just getting something to eat and then we're gonna go hang with the family…" he said eyes darting from one place to another.  
"Oh really…my family's out of town…am I gonna stay with yours then?" Haylie piped up tired of Toby lying to his girlfriend. Ellie just looked at her boyfriend with a cocked head and waited for his response.  
"Uhh…no. Mom said that we have to go somewhere early tomorrow so you're gonna end up going home tonight…maybe next weekend though," he tried to cover.  
"Here's a hint. If a family goes out of town, the child stays with the remaining family in town," Ellie said disgusted. "And plus, I saw you guys kissing."  
"I wasn't kissing her!" he exclaimed.  
"Bullshit!!!" Ellie yelled attracting attention to them.  
"Keep it down," he muttered. "Ok fine, I did kiss her. But it was just a friendly hello kiss…like what you give Marco and Craig."  
"First off…Craig's gay. Second off…you really think I'd go for Marco? And let me demonstrate. This is a kiss that I give Marco and Craig," she said as she pecked him on the lips. "This is a kiss that we do," she said as she kissed him deeply. After a few minutes she started to slip her tongue in there and he gladly obliged. She pulled away and looked at him.  
"That is what you DO NOT do with girls that are not me!!!!" she yelled.  
"Baby…" he started as he grabbed her arm so she couldn't leave.  
"Don't touch me. Don't ever touch me again," she said slowly and pensively as she slapped him across the face. "I saw you two kissing. What the fuck Toby!!?? Remember me, your girlfriend…the one you 'love'?? Yeah, I was watching the whole thing. Apparently everyone was right…you are just a fuck up huh? I'm sure you can get a great job at McDonalds where there's a bunch of skanks everywhere for you," she snapped as she walked away.  
"He told me you guys broke up!!!" Haylie called after her.  
"Well congratulations…now we are. Have at him," she said bitterly as she stalked over to her friends.

Paige just sat there next to Jay and Marco. Everyone was talking around her but no one directly to her. Oh yeah, she went down in flames alright. Suddenly Ellie came flying at them and sat down directly next to Paige.  
"Go Ellie!!" everyone cheered. She just gave them all looks and looked down into her lap.  
"Come on, you just dumped that asshole. You are so much better than him El," Jay said as he gave her a quick hug.  
"Yeah but-" she started to reply but by then the conversation had moved on already.  
"Are you ok?" Paige asked the head cheerleader quietly.  
"No."  
Paige looked around and saw that the only person who was actually taking an interest in Ellie was Ashley…and man was she giving Paige the evil eye. Paige just smiled sweetly at Ashley and turned back to Ellie.  
"Do you wanna talk about it?"  
"You don't even know me…"  
"I know that. I know you're Ellie Nash, I know you're head cheerleader and I know that you had a scumbag for a boyfriend. I know that you just dumped him because you caught him cheating on you. I know that if I were you, I would not be ok. I would wanna chop off his balls, put them in a container and wave them in front of his face so he can see what he used to have."  
Ellie cracked a smile at that one. "You're Paige right?"  
"Yeah. I'm here with Marco…sorry I invaded your little group night," she said quietly.  
"What are you talking about? We just get together, anyone can come if they want! Who gave you the impression that you were invading?" Ellie asked incredulously.  
"Cruella De Ville," she said nodding her head back at Ashley.  
Ellie sighed. "Ash just needs time to get used to people. She's not really…Cruella once you get to know her," she said softly.  
"Yes she is," Jay broke in equally soft.  
"Shut up!!" she scolded him as she swatted his arm. He just grinned at them both and went back to the group conversation.  
"So you're here with Marco?? Like on a date?"  
Paige just nodded. "But apparently we aren't gonna last…"  
"Hallway?"  
"Yeah."  
"It's ok. I was a hallway girl once too. So was Emma...you know before she turned all...goth I guess you could say. You grow out of it and eventually even end up being really good friends with him."  
"Ellie. When I say for the love of God don't , then don't!!!" Craig yelled as he came over to them.  
"Where were you hiding?" she asked confused.  
"Under the damn table so your Neanderthal ex boyfriend couldn't find me and kill me!"  
They all laughed at that one. "Who are you?" he asked nodding in Paige's direction.  
"I'm here-"  
"With me. She's my friend…so be nice to her or I'll make every single one of you cheer at next game," Ellie jumped in.  
"Yeah…about that…I'll choose being nice," Craig joked. "I'm Craig…soon to be dead meat because of your friend right there," he said as he introduced himself to Paige.  
Paige just looked over at Ellie who smiled at her and nodded her head. Next she looked over at Marco, who was her supposeddate. He was smiling at her and kept looking at her throughout the entire nightWow. Paige Michaelchuck was a friend of Ellie Nash and Marco Del Rossi was checking her out all night? She could defiantly get used to this…

a/n: ok so everyone said they wanted more Ellie. So here is an Ellie chapter…if anyone has any ideas that I can use for her, please let know. b/c I was seriously lacking in that department….hope I made people happy. Read and review!!!!


	7. a smoking gun

Chapter 5- A Smoking Gun

"Let's get this over with," Jay sighed as he sat down next to Emma in the library a few days later.

"Excuse me?" she asked confused.

"The project…we're paired together…maybe you just smoked that part of your brain away though," he said as he put his bag on the table. She just looked at the bag and then looked at him.

"I'm sorry did I ask you to stay?"

"Emma, come on. We have to do this sometime…we might as well just do it now."

The blonde sighed and put her book away and stood up. "Fine, but not here."

Jay stood and followed the girl naively and soon ended up behind the school. Emma pulled out a cigarette and lit up.

"What? You want one?" she asked noticing the boy staring at her. To her surprise, Jay accepted and lit up as well.

"What?" he asked blowing the smoke out of his mouth.

"Nothing…just didn't think…"

"That a goody-good like me would smoke? Please," he snorted.

Emma just stood there in shock, she had never seen Jay Hogart in this light. Who knows, maybe he was even cool.  
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"Liberty, what happened?" Hazel asked when she saw her friend.

"Nothing! Why?" she answered defensively.

Hazel just looked at her and took in her bruised arm and how she limped up to them.

"It's nothing…just had…a misunderstanding. That's all."

"Right. And the misunderstanding was Sean I'm guessing, right?" Paige put in.

Liberty just glared at her.

"Libby, what's going on?" Hazel asked.

"Hey Paige!" Ellie said as she passed by on the way to lunch. Paige smiled in response, "Hey El."

"So when did that happen?" Hazel asked.

"When did what happen? She had some trouble last night and I was there for her. That's all."

"Riight...look I gotta go," her friend said as she walked away.

"What's her problem?" Liberty asked watching her friend walk away.

"Apparently I am," Paige responded.  
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Jimmy sat around the lunchroom waiting for Manny. They always met there, that's just what they did. The bell rang and kids were all sitting down eating and still she wasn't there. _Something isn't right…_he thought as he exited the school. He got in his car and quickly made his way to his girlfriends house.

"Manny?" he pounded the door. No answer. He tried again and when he still got no answer, he began looking for a way in. He tried the doorknob and it was open, which was highly unusual.

"Manny?" he asked again as he walked into the house. He rounded the corner and there she was. Beside the dinner table on the floor unconscious. He ran to her side and put her head in his lap. "Come on baby…wake up…" he said running his hand over her face and hair. He had to come pull her out of fires way before at the house where her drunken mother and stepfather had targeted her for their rage. But this had never happened before, nothing this extreme.

"Hey you," came a deep voice from the doorway.

Jimmy looked up and froze. He had his run in with the man before, but never alone in the house when his girlfriend was out cold. It was just him now…and that was scary.

"How did you get in here?" he asked slurring his words a little bit.

"The door was open," Jimmy replied quietly.

"So that gives you the right to walk in to places?" he asked getting progressively closer to the couple.

"I have before. Oh wait, you were already passed out," Jimmy threw at him carelessly.

The grown man punched his stepdaughters boyfriend in the face. "You respect me," he growls as Jimmy hits the floor.

"Fuck you," he breaths out before he attacks him again. The last thing he saw was Manny's eyes flutter…then it all went black.  
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"So what? Meet tonight?" Emma asked as Jay and her walked back inside.

He looked at her in surprise. "Yeah. Bring your notebooks."

She nodded as she parted ways to go to her next class but he couldn't help but notice the little smirk on her face as they parted. He didn't think that Emma would have wanted to meet again unless it was forced. But ever since they had smoked together, she was being…nicer or something. Who knows, maybe there was a person underneath the hag that everyone saw. He smiled a little when he sat down next to Ellie at the lunch table.

"Why are you smiling?" she asked.

"Huh? Oh…no reason," he covered up.

"Who is she?" Sean asked.

"What?"

"The girl. You only get that look on your face if you've met a girl…so is she hot?"

Jay chuckled slightly. "You have no idea…" he muttered. If only his friends knew that him and Emma were getting along and having somewhat fun together. They would shit their shit their pants…so for right now they would be kept in the dark.  
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Alex sat there and stared at their table. The popular kids…the ones that continuously shunned her. They didn't even care who she was, she was a roadblock in the middle of the hallway to them. She sighed and went back to her book when JT sat down.

"Hey Alex," he said.

"What do you want JT?" she asked not looking up.

"Uuummm…how…how are you?" he asked stumbling over his words.

"Fine. I've always been fine. You?"

"Oh I'm ok…" he trailed off.

She sighed and then looked at him. "You know your whole sighing bit doesn't work. I don't feel sorry you…if I remember correctly you cheated on me. As a matter of fact, I'm better than fine, I'm great. So if you don't mind," she said going back to her book.

"Listen, I'm sorry ok? I need you Lexxi...I love you," he pleaded.

She snapped her book shut as she heard that and got up. "Well I don't love you," she said as she stalked away to Gavin, who was walking by at the time.

"Gavin. Of course. Everybody loves Gavin," he muttered to himself as he sank down in his seat to watch his girlfriend and his friend talk.

"Listen so….what are you doing Friday night?" she asked. When he didn't reply for a minute she looked at him and winced, anticipating the worst.

"Friday night? Nothing…I think. Why what's up?" he asked as he thought about it.

"Oh nothing! I just wanted to know…if maybe…you wanted to go out. With me," she said ducking her head.

"Woah Alex. You're asking me out?" he asked in surprise.

"Umm….no. Just forget it," she muttered as she started to walk away, mentally kicking herself for doing something so stupid. He was clearly in love with Ms. Perfect Ellie Nash. She didn't stand a chance with him.

"Because I'm not doing anything…" he said after her.

"Wait, what are you saying?" she asked confused.

He smiled at her. "I'm saying that I'd like to go out with you."

She just grinned. "You're serious?"

He nodded. "Wait, what about Ellie?" she asked sarcastically.

"Ellie's pretty and cool…but I don't know her. I know you….I like you."

"Alright. Fair enough," she said with a humongous grin on her face. He smiled and grabbed her hand as they walked out of the cafeteria. Nobody noticed JT pale and look like he was going to be sick as he watched them as well.


	8. dancing in the streets p one

a/n: alright so i can't help it. i hate ashley on the show so i had to do this to her...shrugs. and i'm sorry that this chappie and the next one are jemma centered...i can't help it. r&r!

Chapter 6- "Dancing in the streets…"

"So remember students, the dance starts at six p.m. And due to last years catastrophe, I'm afraid we will not be having a theme."

"No theme! What the hell?" Ashley complained as she turned around to Ellie.

"Ash, the gym caught fire," she reminded her friend rolling her eyes as she got up.

"So?"

Ellie just sighed and shook her head. There were some things in life that Ashley just didn't get…

"So who are you going with?" she switched topics.

She shrugged her shoulders. "Probably Craig."

"El!"

"What?"

"Craig? Come on! I don't know if you've noticed Ellie but he's gay!"

"And? I don't know if YOU'VE noticed but he's a hottie, gay or not. So even if Toby was an ass, I'll still be there with a hot guy. And he won't be looking at any other girls in the room," she said contentedly as she started to walk ahead.

"Just the guys," Ashley muttered as Ellie turned her glare on her and just stalked off without saying anything.

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Emma looked up and smiled in spite of herself. _Fuck, when did I start smiling when I see him? I'm not happy…this is a sarcastic smirk. Yeah that's it…a smirk_ she told herself reassuringly as he approached.

"Since when did you start smiling?" he asked as he pulled out a chair and sat down.

"It's a sarcastic smirk," she said aloud and then mentally hit herself for saying that.

Jay rolled his eyes and pulled out his book. "Hey umm…I can't make it tonight," he said softly.

She ducked her head, trying not to appear disappointed. "Right, Mr. School Spirit has to go to the dance," she mocked.

He looked up and smirked at her.

"What?"

He just shook his head. "Nothing…"

"Whatever. Look we only have a week left so I guess I can just finish on my own…." She trailed off as she started to pack up.

"It's my grade too Em," he said using her nickname for the first time. "I'm not going to like just dump all of this on you…"

"It's fine. I gotta go," she said starting to walk away but he caught her wrist. Little tingles shot through her when they connected and she cursed herself. Her breath caught and she looked at him in the eyes for the first time and noticed how shockingly electric blue they were. She realized he was looking at her expectantly and she didn't hear a damn word he had said.

"What?"

"I said, will you go to the dance with me?" he asked avoiding eye contact.

She stood there for a second, stunned. Jay Hogart had just asked her to the dance! The two of them in public with each other? Suddenly a thought entered her mind and her face soured.

"What, is this a bet?"

He looked at her like she had three heads. "Bet?"

She rolled her eyes. "Ask the goth girl out and see how good of a grade you can get," she said bitterly as she just walked out of the library. He looked after her and grabbed his bag and followed.

"I don't know what the fuck you're talking about. Nobody even knows that we talk ok?"

She stopped in the middle of the hallway.

"Then why did you do that?"

He shrugged and colored a little bit. "You're a cool girl, surprisingly. I dunno…I just thought….we could go together. Whatever, forget I even said anything," he muttered as he pushed past her.

"Jay wait! I'm…ummm…not doing anything tonight, "she said almost shyly and a slow smile crossed his face.

"Wait, are you saying yes?"

She nodded silently. A grin broke out from ear to ear and she couldn't help but smile a little. "You do know that you'll have to dress up right?" he asked her cautiously.

She rolled her eyes. "Damn I was gonna go in my grass skirt!"

He shrugged. "That'd be fine…."

She slugged him in the shoulder. "You're a pig," she muttered as she walked off.

"Pick you up at 5!"

She just waved her hand back at him without turning around. _Holy shit I just asked Emma Nelson to the dance. And she said yes! I think we're both on drugs…_he thought as he turned away.

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Jimmy's eyes fluttered open and the first thing he saw was Manny, head on his bed sleeping. He smiled and smoothed her hair. She stirred at the touch and opened one eye.

"Jim?" she asked sleepily.

He smiled a small smile and she slowly sat up.

"What happened?" he asked her.

"You don't remember?"

He shook his head and she sighed. "You encountered Chad. And he told you to leave and you actually told him to fuck off," she chuckled.

"I've been meaning to say that one to him for some time," he said.

"Yeah well he knows where you are and where you live. And you know what I mean by that," she said suddenly serious. He did know. There had been a few occasions where the two of them were eating or watching TV and he tore into Jimmy's house and grabbed her by the wrist or by the hair and hauled her out. No telling what he would do to Jimmy for trying to protect her…

"How long have I been in here?"

"About a week," she answered as her cell phone went off. "Hey Em what's up?" she asked as she flipped it open. All the sudden her beautiful features got twisted up between laughing and anger.

"What's going on?" Jimmy asked seeing her face.

"She's going to the dance."

"So…?"

"With Jay."

Jimmy's eyes widened. "Jay Hogart? Pretty boy of Degrassi?" Manny just nodded. "What the fuck?"

"I'm with Jim right now…so no," she was telling the girl. A few minutes later they hung up.

"So what's going on?" he asked clearly lost.

"Well remember how they have to work together on some damn project?"

He nodded.

"Well apparently they like each other," she sighed. "She asked me to come over and actually help her to get ready for this thing! Like I know anything about makeup and hair," she said with a little bit of disdain in her voice.

"Manny, she's a big girl," Jimmy brought up quietly.

She snapped her head towards him. "Weren't you the one that said you'd kill him if he touched her?"

He nodded. "And I will…but he hasn't yet. And by touch I mean more than dancing," he said rolling his eyes. Manny just huffed and slid down in her seat.

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"Isn't this…quaint?" Ashley said rather snidely as Ellie pulled up to Paige's house.

"Shut up ok? Paige's cool once you get to know her."

Ash jus sighed and followed her friend. "You say that a lot you know!"

"I remember when no one would talk to you ok Kerwin?" she said without turning around. The brunette just sighed and followed. She had her there…Ellie had taken her under her wing in middle school and ever since then they had been best friends. And being Ellie's best friend has some major benefits.

"Hi, we're here for Paige…" Ellie said as the door opened and a tired looking women stood before her. Suddenly her features were transformed as she smiled.

"Ellie right?"

"And this is my friend Ash," she said gesturing to the girl who waved in reply. Mrs. Michaelchuck ushered them in and showed them where Paige's room was. They could hear some music coming from with in and Ash just burst in, startling the girl who was singing along to Alicia Keys.

"Ashley?" she asked warily. Paige knew the girl didn't like her much….didn't like her at all in fact. So she breathed a sigh of relief when Ellie walked in behind her.

"Alright Paige, let's see what you got," she said with a look of determination and glee on her face. Paige walked over and picked up a spaghetti strap olive green dress. It had rhinestones along the bust line and little slit in the side. They ordered her to put it on and as she did, Ellie's eyes shone.

"Oh my God. You lied."

"What?" she asked confused.

"You don't need help Chuck. You are wearing that dress with those heels," Ellie said pointing to a pair of simple black heels that were open toed and backless. She put them on as well and Ashley pulled up a chair for her. They took her hair out of the braid she had and took off her glasses. For the next half hour they did her hair and makeup and when they done, Paige hardly even recognized herself.

"Wait, guys without my glasses I'm kind of like a blind bat."

"Contacts….wear them, love them," Ashley said as she handed her a box.

"Paige?" her mother asked as she saw her. She had never seen her daughter so…happy. She looked beautiful and a smile was planted on her face.

"Do I look ok?"

"You look gorgeous," she said tearing up a little bit.

Her two friends walked outside to the car and her mother caught her arm. "Just…be careful ok?"

"Mom it's a dance! Calm down, I'll be fine," she reassured her as she pried her hand off her and went outside.

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"Alright so when do we meet this girl?" Marco asked ribbing Jay.

Jay just smiled. "She's in the bathroom guys, chill," he said rolling his eyes. He looked around at the group and silently prepped himself for the worst. Ash was there with Sean. Ellie was with Craig, Paige with Marco. _This is gonna be fun…_he thought as he saw her awkwardly making her way towards him. She was wearing a black silk dress, strapless and long. She had actually worn her hair down, showing off her natural highlights and put on some natural looking make up…the kind that didn't make her look dead. All in all, Jay had been surprised when she opened the door like that.

"Lost?" Ashley said rudely to her when she stopped at their table.

"Ugly?" she bit back.

Jay stood up quickly. "Ummm….guys this is my…date."

Everyone was speechless, even Paige. She had only been around Jay a few times herself but Emma Nelson did not seem like his type if the world fell apart.

"You look really good," she finally got out seeing that girl looked like she wanted to crawl under the table and die. Emma looked at her with a flicker of recognition and nodded softly.

"Thanks."

"Umm….sit down," Craig said a little awkwardly making room for her.

She sat down gingerly and looked at Jay like she wanted to kill him for making her do this.

"So Emma, how do you know Jay?" Ashley asked.

"English. We're doing a project together," he said quickly. Ashley was one tough brutal bitch. When she didn't like someone, which was usual, she was not afraid to let it show.

"So what you thought you'd get brownie points for taking her here?" she snorted.

Sean grabbed her arm then and hauled her to the dance floor, leaving everyone else sitting there. Ellie and Craig wandered off to find some people and Marco went to get drinks so soon it was just Jay, Paige and Emma. None of them really talking.

Emma looked at Paige for a minute…she knew her from somewhere. Suddenly it clicked. She was the quiet girl in her history class. She always sat in the back and buried her nose in a book…and she never looked like that, that was for sure.

"Wait, how did you get invited here?" she suddenly said.

Paige jerked her head up to look at her. "Umm…Marco invited me. And I guess I'm kinda friends with Ellie….so yeah. Why?" she asked screwing her face up.

"You just don't seem like the type to be here. Wouldn't you rather be hiding your face in a book?"

"Emma," Jay said quietly getting up.

"No it's fine," Paige said looking up at him. "Yeah I like reading so what?" she challenged the girl.

"Just a question," Emma mumbled and then looked up at Jay. "What?"

He shook his head with a little smile on his face. "Wanna dance?"

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Ellie and Craig walked away from the table as fast as they could.

"What the hell is that?" he whispered in her ear.

She looked back and shrugged. "I had no idea they even talked to each other!"

"You know Ashley's gonna tear her apart."

"Hun she tears everyone apart," Ellie snorted.  
Craig ducked his head, curls drooping. "Agreed." All the sudden the Usher song "Yeah" came one and he grabbed her hand. She laughed as he dragged her out there. One thing could be said for Craig, he was a good dancer. She wiggled her but around and laughed as Craig attempted to do the whole kicking one leg in the hand trick and failed miserably.

"Ellie."

She froze. "Go away," she said not even turning around.

"Oh come on! It was just one time!"

"Hey Toby, she said beat it!" Craig said standing up.

He just gave Craig a little smirk. "What are you gonna do…maim me?" he asked sarcastically.

Ellie whirled around and slapped him. "Alright that is enough! You cheated on me, don't fucking try to talk to me now! And leave him the hell alone…because yeah he is gay. But you know what he's more man than you'll ever be…now leave me alone!" she finished the last part in a yell as she shoved him and stalked past him. Ashley started after her but stopped when she saw Ellie grab Paige away from Marco and took her out to the table. A sour expression crossed her face and she leaned against the wall. _She thinks that she can just take over our friendship…oh I don't think so _she thought to herself with a little smile. She inconspicuously sneaked out and headed towards the bathrooms. She knew where the good stuff was…and the good stuff was what she needed right now.


	9. dancing in the streets p two

Chapter Seven- "Dancing in the streets…" part two

"He's here?" Paige asked Ellie eyes wide.

Ellie just nodded, tears in her eyes. "I don't know what to do! I mean he was such a fucking asshole to me…but I still love him…"

Paige firmly put her hand on her friends shoulder. "Ellie, listen to me. I know that you have feelings for this kid still but think about all the shit that he's done to you! I mean he cheated on you with we don't even know how many girls, he treated you like crap…and let's face it you know he hated your best friend."

"Craig?"

Paige nodded.

"Yeah I guess you're right…" she sighed. "And he did treat me like crap didn't he? I mean why should I be upset over seeing him? If anything he should be grateful that I looked at him right?" she said more firmly with conviction.

Paige hesitated before nodding. Ellie got on the power trip bus awfully fast but it was the direction that she needed to be headed. Ellie sighed again, wiped her tears and then stood up and gave Paige a hug.

"Thanks, you really helped me," she said sincerely.

"Me?" she squeaked out.

She nodded emphatically. "I mean when I finally broke up with him, you were the only that would listen to me talk about it! Nobody else even cared."

She shrugged. "Well you were going through a rough time…" she said helplessly.

Ellie smiled. "You're a cool girl you know that?" she asked as she walked away with her back to the dance floor.

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Alex looked at Gavin and smiled. So far everything was going great. Dinner had been perfect and now they were entering the movie theater, holding hands. They had talked all through dinner, laughing and getting along. As soon as they exited, Gavin grabbed her hand and wouldn't let it go. Not that she wanted him to though…

"Alex?" a voice called out.

The couple stopped and she sighed as she turned around. "JT, go away!" but she stopped when she saw someone who wasn't JT. It was a guy with longer brownish hair, baggy jeans and a Hollister t-shirt on. Gavin squinted his eyes at him but the one thing he was sure of was that he had never seen this kid before at Degrassi…so how did he know Alex?

"Rick…" she breathed out.

"How are you?" he asked breaking out in a smile as he hugged her. She took a minute and then hugged him back.

"Good…I've been good. Umm…Rick this is Gavin. Gavin this is Rick. Rick's one of my old friends from where I used to live…" she trailed off helplessly. The two guys shook hands and then Rick took in the situation.

"Wait…are you two on a date?" he asked cocking his head to one side.

"Yeah, we are," she jumped in.

"Wow, I'm so sorry!" he laughed. "Well call me sometime Lex, we need to catch up…I have big news to tell you!" he said as he waved goodbye to them and walked away.

She turned to Gavin. "I'm sooo sorry," she said apologetically.

He looked down at her and smiled. "It's alright, I mean he seems cool." Even though he said he was fine with it all, the truth was that he didn't trust that boy as far as he could throw him…and he just met him! Her eyes were filled with doubt and he leaned down and kissed her slowly and softly.

"I said it was fine," he whispered as he looked at her, her face registering in shock.

She stood there numb for a second and then nodded as he dragged her into the movies. He had just kissed her…on his own free will. And she liked it. And she liked him. But after tonight, she was sure that Gavin would be running for the hills in no time.

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"So Emma, do you know how to do the Electric Slide?" Ellie asked innocently as they all sat down together, guzzeling down sodas. Emma made a face.

"Yeah…"

"Good," Ellie replied as the song started to play and she and Paige dragged Emma out on the floor to make her do it.

The three guys just looked at their dates who were laughing and looking like actual friends for once.

"What the hell happened to her?" Marco asked laughing looking at Emma.

Jay shrugged with a smile on his face. "I have no idea." This was the Emma he had never seen. He had never seen her smile or laugh…and when she did, she just about took his breath away. She looked so beautiful, almost angelic with a smile planted on her usual frowning face and her hair down instead of tied up.

"You like her," Craig said looking at him.

Jay shook his head trying to clear his thoughts. "What?"

"Emma. You like her!"

Jay just stayed quiet for a second and watched the three girls. "Yeah I do. But for the life of me I can't figure out why…" he smirked.

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Emma looked around at the cheerleader and the bookworm and laughed. If someone told her on Monday that she'd be at a dance with the homecoming king and his cohorts and actually having a good time, she'd tell them to fuck off. But yet here she was, doing the Electric Slide with two girls she never thought she'd talk to in her life and actually enjoying it. The truth was that she started to feel bad about being the hag of the night. She knew that Jay wanted her to come here…for some odd reason…and she accepted…again for some odd reason. Well instead of just pissing him off she decided to suck it up and try to have some fun. And if that meant associating with the sheep, then she'd do it. But just for tonight. She looked over at the table where the guys were and noticed Jay staring at her with a smile on his face.

"You like him," Paige said coming up next to her and following her gaze.

"And you would know how?"

"Even though I'm a bookworm geek, I still know how to tell if two people like each other," she shot back. Emma made a face but then her insides jumped. She was right. Paige was right. She did like him…_holy shit the world must be coming to an end…_she thought cynically to herself.

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"Oh I'm sure she's having a ball," Hazel said bitterly stabbing at the ice cream with the spoon violently.

JT and Liberty watched her attack her carton before she gently took it away it from her friend.

"You know what though, she deserves it. I mean she works her ass off and then just sits around reading a book. I'm glad that she's getting out," Liberty said decisively.

JT nodded his head in agreement.

"You know she's friends with Ellie now? Ellie!" she said again to emphasize her point. "She'll forget all about us and then treat us like shit. You know it's gonna happen!"

JT just stared at her. "You're jealous."

"Am not!"

He gave her a look. "I know what it feels like, trust me on that one ok?" he muttered referring to Gavin and Alex going out.

"Haze you know she's not just going to leave us! I mean we've been her friends since forever!" she said gesturing with her arms.

Hazel just sighed and shook her head. "Just wait, I'll be right." Her two friends just rolled their eyes and went back to watching the movie.

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Ashley walked nonchalantly up to the table and picked up a drink that she assumed was Paige's. She looked around before discreetly opening the small bag to pull out a pill that she put quickly in the drink and then sloshed the drink around. _Paige thinks that she can sabotage my friendship, I don't think so. She's got another thing coming after she drinks this…she'll be so friggen stupid that Ellie won't wanna step foot around her! _Ashley set that drink down quickly and then picked up another one and took a quick sip to deter anyone from thinking that she was up to shady business. She heard the voices coming and she quickly moved over.

"Where have you been?" Sean asked as he sat down next to her.

"Oh umm…had to get some air you know…it's so hot in there," she lied through her teeth.

"Whatever," he said putting his arm around her waist. She just smiled lightly at him and looked at her friends.

"So what'd I miss?"

"Emma doing the Electric Slide!" Paige laughed. Emma shot the girl a dirty look and then thought better of it and actually laughed.

"I said I could do it. I never said I was good at it."

"You don't strike me as the type of person who dances in front of their mirror at home," Marco brought up.

She took a sip of her Coke and raised an eyebrow. "What are you talking about? I do it _all_ the time!" she exclaimed as she drank some more.

The group chuckled at that and Jay shook his head as he draped his arm loosely around her waist. She looked at it, looked at him and then scootched closer to him. They made idle chatter for the next few minutes until Emma suddenly burst out, "It's so hot in here!"

Ashley looked at the drink Emma had been drinking and her eyes almost bulged out of her head. She didn't drug Paige, she drugged Emma!

"I have to go!" she said quickly as she got up and practically ran out.

Ellie looked at Sean who rolled his eyes. She shrugged and then turned back to Emma.

"You ok Emma?"

"Yeah I'm fine! Oh my God I wanna dance! Let's go!" she said getting up and dragging the girls with her.

"What the fuck is that? Now she's just acting like she's drunk…I mean I said she can be cool. But this is just…." Craig trailed off. Five minutes later Emma slumped to the ground and Ellie shrieked, causing all the guys to run in. The music had stopped and a circle had formed around Emma on the floor.

Jay pushed his way through and picked up her up in his arms gingerly and Craig and Marco helped to keep the crowd at bay while she was brought out to the tables. Mr. Armstrong passed a glass of water that he tried to revive her with.

"Emma!" he called out when it didn't work. Now he was starting to get worried. She wasn't waking up…and ten minutes before she was acting drunk out of her mind. He shook her a little bit and the called her name again, this time the group was around, Ellie and Paige almost in tears when suddenly her eyelids flickered. Her gaze landed on Jay for a split second and she smiled softly.

"I don't feel so good," she mumbled.

He smoothed her hair back, relieved that she had regained consciousness and nodded.

"Want me to take you home?" he asked softly.

She nodded and closed her eyes again. Jay looked up at Marco who grabbed his keys and went out to his Jeep.

"Alright, shows over! Everybody back in!" Mr. Raditch and Armstrong were yelling, herding the students back in the gym.

"Mr. Hogart, I trust she'll be ok in your care?" Raditch stopped him as he was making his way out the door, Emma in his arms.

"Yes sir. I'll call you later," he threw back to his friends as he rushed outside and to Marco's Jeep. They sped off towards Emma's house and Marco helped to get her inside.

"You got it from here bro?" he asked.

Jay nodded. "Yeah, thanks," he said clapping Marco on the back. "Go on back, and do us all a favor and ask her out already," he said referring to Paige. Marco just smirked and walked out. It was no secret that the two actually liked each other and they were driving everyone crazy with their little dance.

Emma's house seemed empty and so Jay had to hobble down the stairs to her bedroom, her still in his arms. The only way he knew where it was, was because of Spike's note on the door to the downstairs saying that she'd be home later. Jay laid her on the bed and set up a bucket next to her just in case. He sat down next to her and looked at her, she looked so innocent, so angelic almost as she slept peacefully. He knew that she'd bitch about the dress in the morning so he gently unzipped her back and eased her out of her it somehow. Jay laid her in her bed in her bra and underwear, of course not after taking that appreciating second glance, and covered her up with the blanket. He sighed and walked back upstairs to call his friends.

"Yeah no one's here dude, I got her in bed with a bucket. Now what? Stay here?" he asked quizzically looking around. "And do what? Count the glow in the dark stars on the ceiling?" he asked sarcastically. "Fine, fine…I'll stay. Just shut up about it already!" he relented as he hung up. He walked back downstairs and saw that she was still out cold. He sighed and took off his shoes and jacket. Apparently he'd be staying for a little while.

a/n: what's a degrassi story without rick? even though i hated him...i had to throw him in to mix things up even more. see if you guys can guess what happened in alex's past with him! oh and i'm lacking for story line w/hazel, jimmy and mannyand stuff...so any help would be appreciated! you guys rock! -nic


	10. drunk off last night

a/n: alright so I came up the ending of this, finally, and yes the story will mostly revolve around Jemma and some Ellie and Ashley as well. Sorry to people that wanted some good Marco action but I'm just not feeling it. As for the person who wanted to know if Sean was more Craig or Rick, I thought about it and came up with both. So he's a little bit of both

Chapter Eight- Drunk off last night

Emma's eyes twitched open and she opened them lazily. She awoke with a start when she realized there was an arm around her waist…her bare waist. She pushed herself up and looked next to her, eyes growing wide. Jay Hogart…with just his boxers. Suddenly she realized she was just in her bra and underwear. What the hell had happened? She scrambled out of bed and backed away slowly, eyes still on Jay. He opened his eyes slowly and saw her staring.

"Feel better?" he asked.

"What the fuck did you do to me?" she asked slowly through her teeth.

"Woah!" he said sitting up suddenly. "I didn't do anything! You weren't feeling good so I took you home!"

"And you slept with me!" she shrieked.

"Calm down!" he yelled at her. "I didn't sleep with you! I stayed here because you were knocked out!

She snorted. "Then explain the underwear," she said crossing her arms over her chest.

"Uhh…I sleep in it."

She just shook her head not believing him. "Get out."

"Emma listen to me-"

"GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY GOD DAMN HOUSE!" she suddenly screamed, shocking them both. He just looked at her, eyes suddenly going from concerned and worried to cold and hard. Even though they only knew each other a month, she had never seen him like that. He grabbed his clothes and headed for the window.

"Jay," Emma started.

"Save it," he bit back crawling out the window. She watched him go and sank onto her bed. Something was wrong…and by that she meant wrong as though she didn't know something. Tears flooded her eyes as she sat there and stared at her hands. So much for being the one person she thought she thought she could learn to trust…

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"So how was it?" JT asked later that day. JT, Paige and Liberty were all at the Dot; Hazel had family things to do…or so she said.

"Oh my God it was awesome!" she smiled. "Ellie came over to help me get ready with Ashley and we met the guys there. Oh Lord, guess who Jay Hogart brought as a date?" she suddenly asked.

"Manny Santos?" Liberty asked jokingly.

Paige laughed. "That would have been funny. No, Emma Nelson!"

"Emma!" both her friends asked, eyes wide.

"I know! And get this…she was actually pretty cool."

JT put his hand on her forehead and clucked his tongue. "Just as I thought, delirious."

She slapped his hand away. "Cute…ever tell you that I think that you're a jerk?"

He just smiled. "And who said that we weren't friends?" he asked as he hugged her.

"So are you gonna like start hanging out with them a lot now?" Liberty asked hesitantly.

Paige looked at her. "I might. But I mean you guys are always first…you're my best friends!" she exclaimed.

JT nodded and Liberty smiled as she pushed up her sleeves.

"Libby…what is that?" Paige asked quietly looking at her right arm.

"What's what?" she asked forgetting about her arm.

JT jumped up and gently grabbed her arm and traced the bruise that strangely looked like fingerprints. Liberty grabbed her arm away and pulled her sleeves down.

"It's nothing," she mumbled.

Paige just gave her a look. Something was going on here…and it wasn't that Liberty was running into walls because walls don't have fingers.

"So…what's going on with you and Marco?" she asked trying to change the subject.

"Lib-" JT began.

"Leave it ok?" she begged quietly. He just looked at her strongly and didn't say anything.

Paige looked at her two old friends and sighed inwardly.

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Ashley lay on her bed staring at the ceiling. What if someone found out that she's the one that drugged Emma? What if Paige found out it was supposed to be her?

"Hey," Ellie said coming in.

Ashley sat up as her friend entered the room. "Hey."

"So why'd you run off last night?" she asked as she flopped down next to Ash.

"Oh…ummm…my dad wanted the car back by 11," she lied badly.

Ellie just looked at her and nodded. "Emma got really weird after you left. Like she was dancing and then she like…fainted or something."

Ashley looked away and tried to keep her voice even. "Really? That's weird."

"I know. I mean after two hours she warmed up and was pretty cool…but…"

"Why did Jay even bring her?" Ashley wondered out loud.

Ellie just shrugged. "I guess they get along."

"But Jay and Emma? Come on El, you know how weird that is?"

"He's happy Ash, just be happy for him," Ellie said turning to her friend with a weird look.

"I'm sorry ok but I don't like her!"

"You didn't give her a chance!"

"I'm sorry I'm not out saving the world like you are," she shot back.

Ellie's brow furrowed. "Excuse me? What does that mean?"

She rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, befriending Paige? What are you trying to do, up your GPA?"

Ellie sat up. "Ash what the hell are you talking about? Paige is really cool! Have you ever even talked to her?"

"Umm…no," she said sarcastically.

"Listen I don't know what your damage is but call me when you find the old Ash, you know my friend…"

"Oh so sorry that I'm not Paige…or that hag," she called back rolling her eyes.

"You're jealous! Oh my God are you serious?" she asked.

Ashley just scoffed. "Oh honey if I was jealous I wouldn't have done it," she said. No sooner had the words left her mouth than she clamped her mouth shut and turned kind of red.

"Done what?" she asked suspiciously.

She shook her head. "Nothing," she said quickly.

Ellie raised her eyebrow and just opened the door and walked out.

"Thank God I didn't give her ecstasy," Ashley muttered out loud thinking about how much worse the consequences would have been.

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Jay opened the door to reveal Ellie standing on his porch.

"El?"

"We have to talk," she said pushing her way in his house.

He sighed and followed her inside. "Ellie I'm not in the mood right now…" he called after her.

"I don't care! You need to hear this!"

"Alright what happened? Did Toby crash through your fence again?" he asked. Last year Toby and Ellie were having a fight and Toby, drunk one night, drove straight through her fence.

She made a face. "It's about Emma," she threw in to get his attention.

"Like I care," he snorted.

She gave him a look. "You like her and you know it. I know what happened last night."

Jay's eyes darted back to hers…she had him hooked now.

a/n: yes i know this was a filler chapter but it had to be done...


	11. ain't it a bitch?

a/n: alright so I changed my mind again. Sorry if it's messing anyone up! I decided to make Sean more like Rick but no one knows that he's abusive. If that makes any sense….so like he's a closet abusive or something.

Chapter Nine- Ain't it a bitch?

Alex looked at Rick walking up to her and she ducked her head. She couldn't believe that after all these years they had met up with each other…was that fate or just God playing a cruel joke?

"Lex!" he said warmly.

She looked up and tried to smile.

"What's up?"

She shook her head, black hair flying. "Nothing…"

"So that guy…"

"Gavin? "

"Yeah, Gavin. Is that like your boyfriend or something?"

She sighed; better get this over with already. "He was until today."

Rick gave her a confused face. "You broke up today?"

"Umm…no. But he will be today," she sighed.

He just looked at her, not getting it.

"Alright, why are you here?" she finally asked.

He looked down. "I think you know why," he said softly.

"I don't have her."

"What? What are you talking about?"

She took a deep breath. It was now or never… "I know that you knew I was pregnant when I moved down here right?" He nodded. "Well I had her, it was a little girl…but I gave her up."

"Gave her up?"

She nodded. "Rick I was 14! I wasn't ready for that sort of shit!" she exclaimed.

"I was 16! You think I was!" he asked.

Alex ducked her head again. "She would have lived with me and you know it. I couldn't handle a child. And other people can…so I gave her up for adoption."

Rick looked at her in disbelief. "Do you know who-"

"No. And that's how I want it. That way I won't have to look at Christmas cards and stuff. It's just easier."

"Oh yeah? For who?" he snapped as he stood up.

"Rick…" she trailed off standing up as well.

"I can't believe you! You…you had our child and then just threw it away!"

"I did not! If I was going to do that I would have just gotten a Hefty bag!" she snapped.

"You couldn't pick up the phone and call us huh? I mean God forbid you dial some numbers…"

Alex looked away. He was right. She just broke off contact with him and hoped that she would never see him again. They had history…obviously. After a few months she started to think about him less and less and Gavin more and more. So when she saw Rick the other night at the movies, she blanched. She knew why he was here…and she knew she had to tell him. She just wish that he didn't hate her for it.

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Ashley slammed the locker closed and the first thing she saw was Jay's face. She jumped a little bit and then laughed at herself.

"God you scared me!" she said laughing, turning to him. The smile was soon wiped off her face when she saw his face though. "Umm…you ok there Jay?" she asked.

His face was stoic and his bright blue eyes that she had previously told him were a total asset were filled with fury.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he asked lowly so that no one else would hear.

"Excuse me?" she asked turning back to him again, pleasantly confused.

"I know ok? Who does that kind of shit?" he said.

All the sudden Ashley knew what he was talking about. Ellie must have heard her talk about the dance and then passed along word to Jay. Well wasn't this just peachy?

"Jay look…it was an accident-" she started.

"Oh yeah? Then exactly whose drink were you looking to drug?" he snarled.

"Not Emma's!" she fired back.

He stood up at that. "Oh. Then there was a method to this shit? Exactly how sick are you?" he asked disgusted.

"Jay, listen to me!" she said grabbing his arm so he couldn't walk away.

He jerked his arm free. "So who did you really want to get rid of Ash?" he asked louder. She glanced around and saw a few people darting glances towards them.

"Shut up!" she hissed. "Listen it was an accident ok? I never meant to hurt anyone," she said.

He just laughed a humorless laugh. "Accident? Bullshit. You knew what you were doing. You can't talk your way out of this," he threatened as he walked away.

"Is that a threat?" she called after him, putting her hand on her hip.

"Why? You gonna get me too? I might as well just give you my drink then," he called back halfway down the hall.

Ashley looked around panicked and then calmed down when she figured out that no one knew that the hell he was babbling about. She sighed, got her head together and picked up her books from the floor and headed to first period.

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"He tried to do what?" Manny yelled as she jerked up off the bench.

Emma pulled her back down. "Calm down. I think I misunderstood him," she said slowly. "I really don't think he did anything…"

Manny just stared at her and shook her head. "What has gotten into you lately? First you're ditching me for Jay Hogart, who is a stuck up asshole by the way, and now you're defending him? Hell Emma, you went to a school functioned dance!"

Emma just sighed and toyed with her long blond hair. "He's not that bad once you talk to him…" she muttered. "And I mean some of the other people were cool," she tried to reason.

"I can't believe you. I want my Emma back!" Manny said as she shook her as if a demon would fly out of her.

"Manny! Knock it off!" she snapped as she pushed the girl away. "I don't need an exorcism ok? God," she sighed. "Maybe I…wanna change."

Manny raised an eyebrow. "Look I don't know what the fuck you're doing and where your head is these days but I think it sucks. And you know Jimmy would kill you and not to mention Jay if he finds out about this shit."

"So don't tell him," she shrugged.

"Emma, you're like his younger sister! I think he cares more about the two of us than he does his own family! You can't just expect me not to tell him what's going on with you. He already wants to get a hold of Jay since he found about the dance."

"You told him?" Emma's eyes grew wide.

Manny just sighed and blew some smoke out of her mouth and rolled her eyes. "I meant that you were going with ring-a-ding kid."

"Oh."

The brunette stubbed out her cigarette and looked at her. "Wanna go to the Dot later on?"

Emma shook her head. "Can't. I'm…expected home," she finished lamely.

"Oh please like your mom's going to be sober," Manny snorted.

"Shut up ok?" Emma snapped. Her mother was a sore spot with her. Granted her step-father was a teacher here yeah, but ever since they found his cancer had come back, Spike started hitting the bottle full force. Just not in front of Snake of course…she saved those special moments for her daughter.

"Em I don't know why you put up with that shit. Just move out or something," Manny sighed as they started towards the school. "You know you could move in with me."

"Right and live with your mom and her wonderful boyfriend? I'd rather risk it at home thanks."

"I'm just saying-"

"I know what you're saying Manny. And I'm saying thanks anyway," she replied as she walked off, secretly looking for Jay.

"Emma!" Manny called after her. She didn't know what was going on with that girl these days. Granted she was her best friend, but sometimes she felt like she barely knew the girl. All the sudden she's hanging out with the likes of Jay Hogart and Ellie Nash. That's not her…all those people will do is hurt her. And she can't take anymore hurt. Not while she was like this…

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Liberty pulled on her shirtsleeves as she walked through the halls. She was dying in it but she couldn't wear t-shirts. At least not these two weeks. Sean had showed up unexpectedly one night at her house and she just happened to be on the phone with JT. Somehow he had got in his head and Liberty and JT had a thing behind his back…regardless of the fact that he was still hung up on Alex and there was nothing that could be going on behind his back because they weren't together. He had thrown the phone against the wall and then turned back to Liberty. She woke up that next morning and felt like a train had hit her. She was close though…it was just her angry ex.

"Aren't you dying in that?" Paige asked as she sidled up to her friend that morning.

"Umm…no I'm good," Liberty lied. She was praying that she wouldn't see JT…she knew that he would say something to her seeing as how he was still on the phone when Sean had thrown it.

"Libby it's like 70 degrees out!" she laughed.

"I said I was fine!" she snapped.

Paige grew silent and looked ahead of her. "Look whatever's going on you know you can talk to me right?" she said quietly.

"If there was something going on I would come to you," Liberty reassured her.

Paige just smiled a tight smile, not believing her. She had her beliefs that Sean was doing something to her but she never voiced them. She knew that Liberty didn't want Sean around at all and yet he showed up places and she never told him to leave. There had to be rhyme and reason to all that.

"Libby!" JT called as he tore down the hall towards her.

"Great," she muttered.

Paige shot her a questioning look but didn't say anything.

"What's up?" she asked trying to appear normal as he approached them.

"What the fuck was that?" he asked her point blank as he stood in front of her and wouldn't let her pass.

"Excuse me?" she asked.

Paige moved to JT's side and Liberty's eyes widened.

"What is this? Some sort of gang up? Whatever ok? I'm fine, just leave me alone!" she yelled as she ran past them into the bathroom, trying to keep the tears from falling.

"Well that went great," he muttered.

"Are you sure about what happened?" Paige questioned him.

"Paige I heard him like scream at her! I'm damn sure of what happened! And then all the sudden the phone hit something and then cut off. Stuff like that isn't an accident ok?" he snapped at her and walked away. She sighed and then went off in her own direction.

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Liberty burst into the bathroom and just started to sob. She knew her friends cared, otherwise they wouldn't be asking her all these questions. But sometimes she just wanted to be left alone.

"What happened did your little friends ditch you?" a snide voice asked.

Liberty looked up and then cursed in her head. She hated Ashley Kerwin…a good majority of the school did actually. She had no heart and she thought that she was God's gift to the world. Good Lord she was like anything but.

"What do you care?" she sniffed.

Ashley just dried her hands and then dropped the paper in the wastebasket. "Or is it because you lost your little boyfriend?" she asked.

"I don't have one bitch," Liberty bit back.

"Yeah now…because I have him."

"Wait, exactly who are you talking about again?" Liberty asked standing up.

"Sean of course. You think anyone else would touch you? You're like diseased hun," she said as she started to push past her and opened the door. "Besides he only felt bad for you," she added as an afterthought as she exited.


	12. truth hurtslitterally

a/n: sorry that it took me so damn long to update this story but for a while i couldn't find my disk. i still have the ending figured out so hopefully the chapters will keep coming! keep reviewing! y'all seriously make my day when i read them.

Chapter 10- Truth hurts…literally

She walked quietly up to him. "Hey."

"What?" he snapped as he turned around. He saw her and his eyes visibly softened when he realized it wasn't who he thought it was.

"Sorry…" she muttered backing away.

"Wait," he said grabbing her arm gently.

She turned around to face him, arms crossed.

"I didn't do anything that night, I swear," he said searching her eyes for signs that she believed him.

"Then pray tell because I just can't sleep at night without knowing what really happened," she said sarcastically.

"Forget it. Why bother?" he said as he stalked off.

She rolled her eyes and ran to catch up to him. "Jay come on! I was joking! I really do wanna know! I mean I woke up with you next to me…in our underwear…"

"I know. You passed out at the dance so I took you home. Your parents weren't home so I stayed there with you. I figured you wouldn't wanna sleep in that dress so I took you out of it…and then I got tired…" his eyes shifted away from her.

She touched his chin gently and guided it back to her eyes. She searched them earnestly for signs of lying. "No bullshit?" she asked softly.

He looked her dead back in the eye and touched her hand that was on his face still. "No bullshit."

They stayed like that for a few more minutes and then the bell rang. He looked at the damn loud thing and silently cursed it.

"Library, lunch. We need to finish our project," he said as he broke contact.

"What? Oh…uumm….yeah library," she said flustered. She hadn't expected to feel that way when he touched her…those…sparks. They weren't supposed to be there…

"Wait!" she called after him almost too late.

He turned back around.

"Let's ditch. Unless of course that's too bad for you to do…" she mocked.

He smirked at her and then marched right past her, grabbing her hand in the process. She tried to shake him loose but he had a firm grip. Although they had been together at the dance, she wasn't ready to just announce to anyone, especially him that she liked him. And this hand holding thing…it was kind of telling everyone something. When they reached the steps they started to make a run for it before the principal saw them and he finally let go of her hand.

"Emma!" they both stopped dead and she turned.

"Yeah Dad?"

"Don't forget Dr. Abrams at 12!" he called down to her.

She sighed uncomfortably. "I know ok? You told me five different times last night too."

"Well don't forget it. And where are you two going?" he asked finally smelling something suspicious.  
"She forgot her Math homework and I'm running her home. We're both in the same class…" Jay broke in suddenly, with a rather lame excuse.

The three stood there for a minute before Archie finally relented and let them go.

"Math homework?" she laughed when she got in the car.

"We needed something and it looked like you were choking!"

She rolled her eyes and looked out the window.

"So who's Dr. Abrams?" he asked nonchalantly.

Her head snapped towards him. "What?"

"Simpson mentioned it…"

"What is this 20 Questions?" she snapped suddenly growing cold.

"You could just say you didn't wanna talk about it," he said softly, looking straight ahead.

"Fine. I don't wanna talk about it!" she snapped.

They rode in tense silence until they pulled up to a house.

"Where are we?" she asked confused.

"My house. Free food and plenty of it," he said as he opened the door.

"Like my house doesn't have food?" she challenged.

He leaned against the door and stared at her. "What is your deal? We were getting along just fine and now you're like the ice princess or some shit!"

She rolled her eyes and looked away and took out a cigarette. "What do you care?" she muttered.

He just laughed a little bit. "Don't act stupid Em."

"Excuse me?"

"You know I like you," he stated looking directly at her.

She had the cigarette half way to her mouth, unlit and just looked at him. "You…what?" she asked softly.

"You didn't know?" he asked in disbelief.

She shook her head silently. "Why?" she finally asked.

He shrugged. "I don't know. I mean you're cool, you're beautiful underneath all your hag wear…"

"Stop it ok?" she asked as tears pooled in her eyes.

He stopped. "What's going on?"

* * *

Alex raised her hand and knocked on Gavin's door hesitantly. She knew what she had to do…and she really did not want to.

"Lex?" he asked as the door opened.

"Hi," she said quietly.

He opened the door for her and she walked through, Gavin following with a questioning expression.

"We have to talk," she said.

"That's never something good…" he trailed off.

"yeah…"

"We just started going out…" he said uncertainly as he sat down across from her.

"Well it's about that guy from last night."

"From the movies?"

She nodded. "Yeah. Well we used to go out."

"Did you like….kiss him or something?"

"Or something," she sighed. "Look just don't…go ballistic ok?"

He nodded questioningly.

"Where I used to live, we were dating. Well we had been together for two years and I got pregnant. Then I moved here."

"Wait, you have a kid?" he asked sitting back, eyes wide.

"Somewhere. I was 14…I couldn't handle a kid! So I did the right thing and gave it up for adoption. That was 3 years ago…I never thought that I'd see Rick again. I mean I never even called him…"

Gavin just looked at her. "So you're a mom…and that guy is a father…to your kid?"

She nodded, out of words.

"And you have no idea where this kid is?"

"No. And that's how I want it. I don't want to see him on a Christmas card and be reminded of my decision."

He stood up. "You should go," he said quietly.

"Gav…" Alex started with tears in her eyes. "Come on, you said you wouldn't go ballistic!"

"I just need to think ok?" he said as he opened the door.

"Call me later?"

He just looked at her and shut the door. She sat down on the doorstep and just cried. For 2 years she had wanted to go out with Gavin Mason…and now that she is, she managed to mess it all up!

* * *

Emma lay in bed that night, staring at the ceiling. After he told her…what he did, she flipped out. No guy had ever told her those things before and meant it. No guy had ever…just cared about her. But Jay was different. She could tell when she caught him looking at her, in how he spoke to her. How he was silently pleading for her to believe he hadn't done anything wrong after the dance when most guys would have just let it go. As much as she tried to deny it, she did like hanging out with him. It was something different, like a breath of fresh air among the smoke filled clouds. He dropped her off at the doctors office and offered to wait for her but she just waved him ahead. She had a bad feeling about this appointment and she didn't want to him to witness the effects. Hell, he didn't even know yet so there would be another round of incessant questioning. And that was just something that she didn't want to deal with.

"So how was the doctors?" Snake asked that night at dinner.

"Not great, but what did I expect?" she sighed.

Spike just shot her a look and Emma rolled her eyes.

"She said that it's back."

"It's back? But I thought-"

"Well we thought wrong," she grumbled.

"So what are the options?"

"Same as last; go through chemo and hope it works…or just give up."

Her parents looked at each other and then back at her.

"I'll call tomorrow and set up…"

"No," she broke in quietly.

"Emma," Spike warned.

"No this is my life! Chemo messes me up…I'll lose my hair again and I'll get sick. Most people don't even have a clue about me and I'd rather keep it that way."

Snake just nodded, he knew himself what she was talking about since he was a cancer patient himself ironically.

"Let her do it Christine," he said softly. Spike looked at her husband, about to protest but instead thought different and clamped her mouth shut. Emma stood slowly and moved away from the table.

"I'm going to go," she said softly.

"Where?"

"The hospital; I need to see Jimmy."

* * *

Emma ran into the room where her best friends were and stopped short when she saw an empty bed and a clean room.

"Um excuse me, can you tell me where Jimmy Brooks is?" she asked anxiously.

The nurse looked up slowly. "Oh I believe he got sent home today," she said cheerfully with a smile not noticing Emma's expressions. She sighed.

"Thanks," she muttered as she left the hospital. He left today and neither one of them called her…she was chewing that thought on her way to his house when a car pulled up.

"You know it's gonna rain," a voice spoke up.

"Go away."

"Emma…"

She spun around. "What the hell do you want? Are you following me or something? God damn it get your own life!" she yelled.

He sat back in his seat. "I'm going to see Ellie. You're not the only thing that I think about it, as hard as that is for you to believe. Trust me, my life is filled with more important things than a selfish little goth bitch that thinks she's too good for general public," he spat out as he started to drive away.

"What did you just say?"

"What are you hard of hearing?" he asked.

"What the hell is your deal Hogart? One minute you're telling me that I'm beautiful and now it's like you want me to die!"

He just glared at her. "Well I decided why the hell am I chasing you around for if you won't give me the time of day? This is all just a big joke to you isn't it? Well it's not ok Emma! I like you end of story. But if you're just gonna be a fucking bitch about it and life in general, I'm sorry that we ever started to talk. I'll just finish the project myself," he said as he started to roll up the window.

She just stood rooted to the spot. Against her will, tears started to fill her eyes again.

"Damn it!" she yelled. "I'm not supposed to do this!" she yelled out loud.

He just sighed and gave her a look.

"Look can we talk?" she asked suddenly.

Jay looked around mockingly. "Who, you mean me? Oh my Lord am I really going to be blessed with your presence?"

"Fine, fuck you then!" she stopped halfway across the street.

He leaned over and opened the door for her. She looked at it for a second before getting in.

"Where were you headed?"

"Jimmy Brooks house. But…ummm…can we go somewhere?"

"We? As in us?"

She nodded. He gave her a weird look but pulled into the parking lot of a deserted craft store.

He turned off the car and kept looking straight ahead.

"So you gonna explain this afternoon or what?"

"What?" she was taken aback that he would just jump in like that.

"This afternoon. I said that I liked you and you like started to cry. That's not a normal reaction by the way."

She took a deep breath. "No one's ever said that stuff to me before ok? I was surprised that out of everyone in the world, they'd be coming from you. And when you dropped me off this afternoon?"

"Dr. Abrahms?"

She nodded. "Do you really wanna know why I went there?" she asked quietly.

He turned to look at her finally but didn't say anything. She snuck a glance up at him and looked back down again.

"It all started like years ago. Somehow I had concocted bone cancer. I'm not sure how…"

"Wait…so you're telling me you have cancer?" he asked in disbelief.

She just shot him a rude look. "I went through chemo when I was little and I just didn't go to school that year, my parents homeschooled me until the hair came back. The doctors said that I was in remission. That was like 7 years ago."

"And…."

She took a deep breath. "Why the hell am I talking to you?" she asked suddenly, her breath caught in her throat. She never told anyone this stuff besides Jimmy and Manny. And here she was spilling her guts in the homecoming king's car. How fucked up could the world possibly be?

He touched her face gently to bring it back to him. "Because you know I'll listen," he answered her.

She looked down. "It's back."

"What's back?" he asked confused.

"Santa! What we were just talking about."

"Cancer?" he asked bewildered.

She nodded, not meeting his gaze as a tear fell from her eyes. She silently cursed herself for feeling in front of some guy that she had no idea who she was. Jay was just sitting there staring at her and then staring out the front window.

"Holy shit…" he finally whispered.

"What?" she sniffed.

"Emma, you have cancer! What do you think?"

She was taken aback by the loudness of his voice in the little car. "It doesn't involve you ok Jay? God I was just getting shit off my chest! I'll just walk from here, thanks," she said going for the door handle.

"Yes it does!"

"And how is that? Let me guess, your precious project won't get finished on time? Oh my God, anything but that!" she said holding her hand over her heart in mock agony. He just looked her straight in the eye and she gradually met his gaze and slowly dropped the hand.

"What are you doing?" she asked uncomfortable.

He shrugged. "Just looking."

"Well then take a picture," she said as she started to shift.

He caught her chin and brought it back up.

"Jay!" she was cut off though as he gently leaned in and kissed her sweetly.

She pulled away immediately and stared at him.

"What the hell was that?" she yelled at him as tears flooded her eyes again.

He saw that and nodded. "What I thought would happen."

"Meaning what?" she snapped.

"You're crying because I kissed you."

"Yeah because now I have to go boil my mouth. Do you have any idea how much that shit that will hurt?"

"Or is it because you like me too?"

She grew quiet. "Yeah…right. Me like you? You wish," she said looking out the window and scoffing.

"Look me in the face and tell me that."

"Fine! God…" she whirled back around. "I don't like you!" she said as her voice wavered. She reached for the handle then and got out and started to run, tears flowing.

"Emma!"

"I don't like you! I don't want to! You're the kind of person I want to avoid…you make me feel….all weird and do shit that I swore I wouldn't do!" she said as she heard him follow her. "Happy? Now leave me the hell alone!" she said.

He caught her arm and spun her around. "What the fuck is your problem? Can't take a hint?" she hurled at him.

He just looked at her and brushed hair away.

"Stop it," she pleaded quietly.

He shook his head. And pulled her into him. She looked up at him at that point and all her feelings were on her sleeve and he read every one of them perfectly. They kissed each other this time. She clung to him like he could save her from whatever demon she was facing and he just wrapped his arms around her and let her cry into his shirt.

Suddenly there was the sound of brakes and Jay looked up and sighed inwardly. This was going to be fun…

"Emma!" came Jimmy's voice as he came barreling over and he did not look happy…


	13. you can see better in the light

Chapter 11- You can see better in the light

Alex opened her eyes and sighed. Monday already and she was boyfriend-less. She heaved a great sigh and slowly sat up and dragged herself over to her closet and threw on some old jeans and a New Found Glory t-shirt. The outfit was something that she usually didn't wear, true, but she didn't care. She was tired and it wasn't like she actually wanted to go to school today anyways.

"Alex!" a voice called as she neared Degrassi. She sighed and stopped, recognizing Hazel's voice.

"I heard what happened this weekend!" she said sympathetically. She then stopped and noticed her outfit. "Umm…what are you wearing?"

She shrugged. "New Found Glory, good band. And I don't need the pity routine Hazel, I'm fine," she said unconvincingly. Hazel just eyed her but didn't say anything.

"So…what's new with you?" Alex said a few minutes later to break the uncomfortable silence. Her and Hazel had been friends for a while yes, but there was still that barrier that made it uncomfortable. Both were kind of unsure of what to say to the other but the put up with the other one to make their friends happy.

The girl just shrugged and shook her head. "Not much. Paige is like best-friends with Ellie now and is going after Marco like there is no tomorrow," she said somewhat bitterly.

"Wait, Ellie and Paige?"

"I know."

"No. I mean good for her! She always had like three friends and everyone could tell she wasn't happy. Maybe now she will be."

Hazel just stared at the raven haired girl. "Are you listening to yourself? She's with Ellie and her friends now! She'll drop us and go out with Marco and be like another one of those friggen clones and ignore us and sit on us."

"You get sat on?" Alex asked amused as they started to climb the stairs.

"You know what I mean," she huffed.

"Listen, if she was going to 'ditch us' then don't you think she would have already? I mean if she hasn't yet, chances are she won't. And I doubt that she'll ever sit on you," she said as she lied a hand on the girls shoulder jokingly.

"You don't get it ok?" she sighed as she started to walk away.

"Maybe you're the one that doesn't!" she called back but Hazel just waved her hand behind her back without turning around.

* * *

Paige pushed JT into a locker and stared at him.

"What the hell Paige?" he groaned as he rubbed his arm. Paige might not look that strong but when she gets mad, she gets strong.

"Spill about Sean," she demanded.

He sighed. "What do you think?" he arched an eyebrow at her.

"If I answered that I wouldn't have to ask," she shot back.

He rolled his eyes but nodded as he walked past her. He walked to a bench and waited for his friend to sit down before opening his mouth.

"They always fought, we both know that. He cheated on her, we all know that. He claims he loves her, which is shit. Once again, we all know that. He gets angry, duh. But when he gets angry, he also gets a tad…delusional?" he said searching for a right word. Paige just looked at him, waiting for the continuation of the speech she was sure to come.

"I called her the other night. We were just talking like old friends. I mean she was laughing and we were going to hang out and stuff. And then all the sudden I heard something in the background and it was him. I don't know if he was drinking or what but he sounded like it. He said that she was being a little slut and cheating on him with me. Argued over the fact that a) she's not with him and b) we don't like each other and he just like didn't hear it or something. I heard a yelp which I know came from her because lets face it, Sean just doesn't exactly seem the yelping kind. He started yelling again and she was crying. I don't know where the hell the phone was but it sure as hell wasn't in her hand," he said finally taking a breath.

Paige just sat back rolling all this around in her head. Her worst fears were being confirmed. Her best friend was being beaten by Sean Cameron, just like she thought.

"And then what?" she asked quietly, almost afraid of the answer.

He looked at the ground and swallowed as though it pained him to say this. "I heard a slap and then for some reason he picked up the phone and started to yell at me and say weird shit like I'm stealing his women or something. I don't know. But then like he threw it at the wall or something because all the sudden I got the disconnected sound."

"He probably hung up on you," Paige said trying to find a positive answer. JT just looked at her. She ducked her head and looked at the floor.

"So that would be why she's wearing all those damn shirts huh?"

He just nodded silently.

"He beats her?" she asked tears in her eyes.

JT just got up. "We're going to be late."

"JT!" she looked at him like she was crazy but saw Liberty coming and knew what he was doing. The three of them had been best friends since 7th grade and there were very few secrets between them. Apparently this was one of Liberty's and Paige had to try her damndest to pretend she didn't know. She sighed and looked out the window as she approached.

"What's up with her?" Liberty asked seeing Paige's eyes filled with tears.

"Trouble in paradise," JT said evasively as he started to walk away.

* * *

Gavin entered the room and looked for an empty seat. What a coincidence, the only one open was next to Alex. He sighed and started there. He avoided her eyes and sat down and opened up his notebook.

"Hey," she said quietly.

He nodded his head but other than that no words were exchanged. She sighed and looked at the substitute who was explaining what the daily work was going to be. She wrote down what he was writing and then turned back to him.

"Will you just listen to me?" she asked a little impatiently.

He rolled his eyes but didn't say anything.

"Yeah I was with Rick. Years ago. Yeah I had a kid. It was an accident. As wrong as that sounds, it's true. I wasn't ready for it and neither was he. He came here because he though that I had kept her. I didn't. I had a baby girl and I gave her up for adoption. I couldn't handle the duties of being a mother! And I sure as hell wasn't going to talk to him! I moved here and I tried my hardest to forget about him. When he showed up the other night, I was floored ok? He just moved here for college and we bumped into each other; it's not like we planned it. He asked me about the baby and I told him what happened. If it makes you happy I think he hates me more than you now…" she trailed sounding hopeful that he would at least talk to her.

Gavin just looked away quickly and sighed before looking back at her.

"I don't know what to say ok?" he finally said.

She just nodded. "Well can you at least tell me if you hate me too? Because I can give you his number and y'all can like form a club or something."

"It's not funny Alex! My girlfriend had a kid with another guy-"

"Years ago before I met you!"

"Regardless!"

"Then tell me Gavin, why does it matter so damn much? I don't have her! I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to think I was some sort of freak! God!" she half yelled. She looked around suddenly realizing how loud she was. Thankfully only a few people noticed as the rest of the class was being as loud as she was. Substitute days meant jack off days when you could do what you wanted to. Everyone copied off someone in the end.

"I don't think you're a freak! I think you're a great girl with more brains than I'll ever have and good Lord you're beautiful….but Alex, you can't just pretend like it never happened," he finished after a minute.

"Why not?" she asked definitely eyes starting to fill with tears. Fighting with him had not been on the days agenda and neither was bringing up her baby that was somewhere with some family.

"Because it happened to you! It's a part of who you are now. And Rick, you'll always be tied to him. You'll never be able to forget him or what you felt."

She closed her eyes slowly. "What are you trying to say? That you can't be with me?" she asked lowly her voice choked up with unshed tears.

He sighed. "I don't know. You can't keep doing this to yourself. God what the hell do you do at Christmas?" he asked.

She stood up suddenly and he just looked at her. "What are you doing?" he asked confused.

"Look I don't need this ok? Gavin I like you, I really do. And God I've waited so long to go out with you but damn you ok? I had her three years ago, I gave her up three years ago! I forgot about it three years ago! I don't think about it and I sure as hell don't think about him. Now why are you trying to make me?" she asked as a tear fell and she picked up her bag and fled the room.

* * *

Emma opened her locker and suddenly Manny appeared at her side.

"What do I have a device on my locker that when it opens you show up?" she asked sarcastically.

"What the fuck were you thinking!" she hurled at her best friend.

Emma just sighed. "Look it's hard to explain ok?"

"Try me." Manny squared off against Emma and stared at her with a no bullshit type of expression on her face.

Emma just looked at her, back in her locker and then at Manny again. She finally opened her mouth.

"Remember when we met?"

Manny just stared at her like she was crazy.

"We were little and let's face it, we were actually good girls. Remember how I went in remission?"

"Emma…" Manny said quietly. She didn't like to talk about that time in their friendship. They had known each other for years and years but that was the time when they were convinced that Emma wasn't going to be around for years and years.

"No. I'm talking and you're going to listen. Remember how we both thought that I wasn't going to be around?"

Manny just stared at her wondering why all this was being brought up. "Yeah. And you went into remission and we threw you that big party," she said softly. "The doctor said that you were ok. What's your point?"

"That I'm not," she said bluntly.

"What?"

Emma took a deep breath and turned to the girl she had known since she was eight and finally forced out the painful words. "It's back."

Manny's breath caught and she fell back against a locker. "What do you mean?" she asked cautiously, mentally scolding herself. She couldn't mean the cancer. Hello, she went into remission, the doctor said that she was fine. It couldn't be back…

"What do you think Manny?"

Manny closed her eyes and shook her head. "When did you find this out?"

"Yesterday."

"Well when do you start?"

Emma shut her locker and picked up her bag. "I'm not," she said simply.

"What? Emma you have to!"

Emma just laughed bitterly. "No I don't. Manny it's my life…or whatever's left of it."

"Stop it ok? You're going to tomorrow and everything'll be fine…"

Emma stopped and turned to Manny who looked like she was going to cry. "Manny. I'm seventeen. I can do what I want and I don't want to ok? I remember what it was like with my hair falling out and I couldn't go to school or anything. I don't want that. Besides it came back even with all that. There's no point."

Manny took a deep breath. "Does Jim know?"

Emma shook her head. "He saw me and Jay yesterday and got pissed off. He practically ripped us apart, shoved me in the car, chewed me out the whole way home and avoided me all of today," she said rolling her eyes.

"Well what were you doing with him?" Manny asked after a minute. She didn't want to change the subject but the curiosity got the best of her.

"I went to the hospital looking for Jimmy and they said that he got sent home. I started walking and Jay showed up. We argued and then for some reason he started to give me a ride to Jimmy's house and we started to talk. He pulled into a parking lot and we were just talking and I told him. About everything. And then…he kissed me," she said softly with a little smile.

"He kissed you? Jay Hogart kissed you? And you're smiling!" Manny half yelled.

Emma rolled her eyes. "Well actually I got out of the car and started to run away."

"Good!"

"And then he came after me. Look he likes me ok? And…I think I like him," she said softly.

"You did it again didn't you?" Manny asked accusingly. "You kissed him and you liked it and Jimmy saw it and now he's pissed," she said finally putting the pieces together.  
Emma just nodded silently.

"Well what does Mr. Hogart have to say about all this?" she said putting her hands on her hips.

"Nothing. Because I'm not talking to him. As far as he's concerned yesterday was a fluke."

Manny just watched her friend walk away and sighed. She just told her that she had cancer and pretty much didn't care if she died and then said that she made out with the homecoming king and liked it! Half of her wanted her friend to be happy. After all these years she definitely deserved it. But the other half was certain that there was someone else out there besides Jay Hogart!

* * *

a/n: wow sorry that i haven't done anything in a while with this story. but i think that it's coming to an end soon and don't worry i already have the end all figured out. so hopefully it won't take that long for me to complete this thing. as always, read and review and tell me what you think! -nic 


	14. bang bang you're dead

Chapter 14- Bang, Bang, You're Dead

"Hey"  
Liberty looked up and then started to gather her things to move.  
"Libby come on!" he pleaded.  
"What?" she snapped.  
He smiled slowly, hoping to win her over. "I'm sorry about the other night ok? I mean of course you're not with JT. You wouldn't cheat on me."  
She narrowed her eyes. "Sean, I don't know if you've noticed but I'm not with you either. We broke up remember? So even if I was with JT, which I'm not, it shouldn't matter to you."  
The smile dropped off his face and he sighed. "All I ever did was love you. Why the hell are you making this hard?"  
"What the hell are you talking about? And love me, is that what you did? I don't think so. Last time I checked love was nice. What you do, did, is not nice," she snapped.  
"I didn't do anything," he said through clenched teeth.  
She glared at him. "Then tell me Sean, why do I have to wear long sleeve shirts when it's 70 degrees outside?"  
"Because you're clumsy and you fall a lot," he supplied in a warning tone.  
Liberty just snorted. "Whatever. Look I have to go. Stay the hell away from me," she said as she got up and turned to leave.  
Sean caught her arm and she winced in pain as he grabbed an old bruise that he, himself gave her. "I'm not finished! You are my girlfriend Liberty and I don't know if you know this but girlfriends respect their boyfriends. Or do I have to teach you how?" he threatened in her ear.  
She was breathing slowly and controlled, like she taught herself to over the years but inside she was freaking out. She hated him. There was no way that she was going to let him touch her ever again. But she couldn't just let the cat out of the bag and tell people, because that would just make matters worse.  
"Hey, what's going on?" another voice asked.  
Liberty looked up to see Paige and Marco walking towards her and Paige did not look happy to see Sean.  
Sean instantly let go of her and smiled. "Marco, hey!" he smiled as he walked over to his friend. Liberty let her breath out in short spurts as he walked away and her other friend approached her.  
"What was that?" she asked lowly.  
"It was nothing ok? Just…mind your business."  
Paige shot her friend a hurt look. "Liberty, you've been my best friend since we were little. Your business is mine. Especially since…" she trailed off. She wasn't supposed to let her know that JT told her about Sean.  
"Especially since what?" she snapped looking into her eyes. She knew Paige knew. Looking into her eyes and seeing the fear and anger in them, she knew.  
"Why are you wearing those shirts?" she whispered.  
"Because I'm cold. Forget it ok?"  
Paige looked over at her boyfriend and his friend and scowled as Sean got up to leave.  
"What was that look for?" Marco asked confused as he came over to the girls.  
"I just…really don't like him," she finished.  
Marco perched on a table and shot her a confused look. "Ok…"  
Paige tucked her long blonde hair behind her ear and looked at Liberty. She was going to hate her now, she was sure of that. But it couldn't keep going on like this.  
"He…hits-"  
"I have to go," Liberty said suddenly as she got up to go.  
Paige stood up in front of her. "Show me," she insisted.  
Marco looked at Paige like she was growing three heads. "She just has to go Paige. What's your deal?"  
"Leave. Me. Alone," Liberty said slowly, tears pooling in her eyes.  
"You used to tell me everything…even then things you didn't want to. Remember that? No secrets?" Paige asked as a tear fell.  
Liberty sniffed. "I have to go," she said pushing past her and walking out, swiping her eyes as she did so.  
"I know that he hits you!" Paige called out to her. Marco stared and Liberty stopped.  
"What the fuck is going on here?" Marco asked slowly as he got up and walked over to Paige. "Sean wouldn't hurt a fly. I've known him for years. What the hell is the matter with you?" he asked kind of angrily.  
Liberty let out a sarcastic laugh. "Wouldn't hurt a fly. No, just people." She walked back over to them slowly.  
"Will someone please let me in on the little fucking secret already?" Marco asked spreading his arms wide, indicating that he was fed up.  
Paige grabbed her friends hand, gently and rolled up the sleeve to reveal the black and blue fingerprints on her arm.  
"Lib…" she whispered crying with her friend now.  
Marco looked at the arm repulsed. "Who did that?"  
"You best friend Sean did, that's who!" Paige yelled bitterly.  
Marco stood back, floored. "Sean…Sean did that to you? He hits you?" he asked slowly in disbelief, still staring at her arm.  
When neither one of them responded he turned to go. "I have to go," he said lowly.  
"Marco!" Paige called.  
"Where's he going?" Liberty asked in a panic as the door shut behind him.  
Paige shook her head slowly. "I have no idea…"

* * *

"Will you please just think about it?"  
Emma rolled her eyes as she grabbed a lighter to light her cigarette. "Yes Dad, I'll be sure to."  
Jimmy scowled as he knocked the cigarette out of her mouth. "And stop doing that shit," he snapped.  
"Why? They can't give me cancer. I already have that," she replied looking away.  
"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked her softly. When he found out earlier that day he had genuinely been hurt that she didn't tell him and Manny first, but Jay instead.  
"I was going to. And the lady at the hospital said you were free. So I was walking to your house and Jay picked me up. It's not like I planned on telling him Jim."  
"And that kiss…."  
She smiled. "Was nice."  
Jimmy sat up and looked at her, eyes wide. "Excuse me!"  
"He kissed me. And then I kissed him ok? He likes me….and I think…I think I like him too," she admitted softly.  
"You have no idea what you're talking about."  
"Jimmy I have cancer, not amnesia. I know what I'm talking about thank you!"  
"Emma…you know that you'll only wind up hurt. And right now-"  
"Right now I need to have fun ok? And that's what happens when I'm with him. I have fun," she said as she started to get up.  
"Em!" he called after her.  
"Call me when you're not going to lecture me ok?" she asked walking backwards into the school.

* * *

"Hey Paige, what's going on?" the red head asked as she opened her door.

"Have you seen Marco? He ran off this afternoon and I'm not sure I exactly trust him at the moment-"

"Yeah. He's here," Ellie sighed, opening the door for her to come in.

"So he told you?" Paige questioned hesitantly as she walked in.

"Umm…well he said that Sean was going to die. And that's about it so far. What's going on though? I mean I know Sean is an asshole who can't keep a girlfriend…"

"Yeah…did you ever wonder why he can't keep a girlfriend?"

"Because he cheats on them," Ellie said matter of factly.

Paige snorted and Marco came into the hallway. "Sorry…for this afternoon…" he said not exactly looking at her.

Paige just lowered her eyes as well and nodded. After a minute she looked back up at her qausi-boyfriend. "Just don't…do anything stupid ok? Like don't say anything to him…"

"Paige!" he started.

"I know ok! I know. Trust me you think I wouldn't like to have a go at him? I'll be first in line hun. But you can't ok? Do it for me…for Liberty."

Ellie was watching her two friends like a tennis match before she put her hands up. "Alright…let's play a little game. It's called tell Ellie what the hell is going on. Here's how we play-"

"Sean can't keep a girlfriend just because he cheats on them," Marco jumped in.

Ellie stayed silent and looked at them expectantly.

"Well…."

Paige sighed and closed her eyes as if it pained her to say it. "He beats them," she said softly.

Ellie shook her head as if she heard them wrong. "I'm sorry. Did you just say that Sean beats his girlfriends? See, that's where you're wrong. I've known Sean for years and years…he wouldn't do that. Sorry Paige…but I really think that you're jumping to accusations here," she said crossing her arms.

"El…I've seen it ok? You know he's been going out with Liberty. Well today I saw exactly why she stays with him. If you've ever noticed the girl wears long sleeve shirts. It's like 85 degrees outside!"

"No. You're wrong ok? I know him. He's been there for me when no one else was. And now you guys just think you can-"

"Look. I'm sorry alright? I understand that he's like your brother or something but Liberty has been my best friend since I was in diapers. She wouldn't lie about this…and she's not. The two of us have seen the proof. What more proof do you need?" Paige asked.

Ellie stayed silent for a minute and looked at them.

"You know we wouldn't lie about this Ellie," Marco said quietly.

Ellie shook her head silently, tears forming slowly in her eyes as she heard what her friends were saying. "I know."

* * *

The brunette took a deep breath and walked up to the blonde slowly. "Paige, hey," she said with false brightness.

Paige in turn, looked at her coldly. "What do you want Ashley?"

"I just thought that we could…hang out or something. Haven't seen much of you lately," she finished with a shrug.

Paige looked around like she was being Punk'd. "Are you kidding me? Is there a camera somewhere?"

Ashley just looked at her confused. "What are you talking about?"

"I know what you did Ashley. Did you think I wouldn't find out? That little stunt that you did at the dance…drugging Emma's drink? Real cute. What's even cuter…is that you thought it was mine! Funny huh? Well you know what I find funny? How Ellie doesn't even talk to you anymore. That's right. We're friends; me and her. And there's nothing you can do about it Ashley. Drug all my drinks if you want. Don't think you won't be found out," she turned on her heel.

Ashley just stood in the corridor, head spinning. "Who told you that bullshit? I wouldn't drug you!"

Paige just snorted. "Riiight. So Jay and Ellie were lying then eh? Don't think so. Do me a favor…don't talk to me ok?"

Ashley was left alone in the corridor, staring after the blonde. _Great, now everyone knows that I fucked up. Wait…what the hell? I helped make that girl! Before me and El she was just a little loser with only books for friends. Who is she to dictate to me who I can and can not talk to? And Ellie just hasn't talked to me because she's been busy. God that girl needs some serious help…_ she thought to herself as she picked up her cell phone.

"Ellie, hey!" she said happily when her friend picked up. "You will never believe what Paige just said to me! What do you mean you know? I haven't even told you yet. Well where did you get that insane lie from?" she asked putting her hand on her hip. "From me? I never said anything like that! You know I would never do that to someone! Ellie…hello?" she sighed and hung up the phone, cursing herself for talking out loud in front of her friend.

* * *

"Hey," Jay said as he plopped down next to Emma at her desk.

She looked at him and gave a brief smile. "What's up?"

"So…about yesterday…." He started.

"What about it?"

"Emma…we kissed…..and you told me…"

"Just forget it ever happened ok?" she asked not looking at him.

"Look at me," he said suddenly.

She closed her eyes and sighed. "What?" she asked more impatiently as she turned to look at him.

"Do you really want me to forget that we kissed? And that we told each other how we felt? Or how about that you told me that you have-"

"Jay! Do we really have to do this? Right here, right now?" she cut him off.

He arched an eyebrow to insinuate the message why not.

She sighed. "Fine. Do I want you to forget it?" she took a breath. She could lie and say yes forget everything ever happened and go on her merry way. Or she could tell him the truth. And the rate that they were going…she was probably better off with the truth. "No I don't ok? But it's better this way. Trust me, you'll see that I'm right. You have your friends that think I'm a hag bitch and I have my friends that would rather die than see me with you. It would just…save both of us a lot of stuff," she finished lamely.

He looked around for a minute and then looked back at her. "Do you think I care? Do you really think I care what my friends think? If I did, I wouldn't have brought you to the dance. And I'm guessing that if you really cared what your friends say…then you wouldn't have said yes. So tell me the real reason here Emma."

She sighed and looked up at him slowly, meeting his electric blue eyes. "I'm not doing chemo," she whispered.

He shook his head as if he didn't get it.

She sighed. "I'm not doing chemo. I'm giving up Jay. Maybe you don't get that. Someday, probably soon I won't be here anymore. And then where will you be?" she asked, her voice getting thick.

His eyes grew softer at that and he smiled and touched her hand. "I don't care about that Emma. What I'm trying to understand is why you don't want to be happy for the time you have left?" he asked as he looked in her eyes.

She looked at his hand and then at him and smiled softly. "I do want to be happy. I just know I'm going to hurt people in the long run."

He stood up, still holding her hand, hauling her to feet as well. "You know what I say?"

She looked at him like he had three heads. "Umm…no?"

"Fuck 'em all. Let's go," he said turning to walk away.

She looked around for the teacher and not seeing her, followed him out.


	15. saturday night's alright for fighting

Chapter 15- "Saturday night's alright for fighting…"

Ashley pulled the last item out of her locker and sat there and looked at it for a couple of minutes. It was a simple picture…but that simple picture meant the world to her. It was the day that Ellie, Jay, Marco and herself skipped school and went to beach last year. They spent the whole day making sand castles and throwing each other in the water. The picture itself was their proud stance as the girls showed off their castle as if someone could live in it, Marco had his arm around her shoulders and Jay was running behind with a bucket of water to pour over Ellie's head. It was a moment frozen in time. And as she sat there and stared at it, she realized she was never going to get that moment back. She messed up. She never should have attacked Paige like that, she knew that now. But what's done was done. And these people weren't exactly the forgiving type apparently.

"Doing a little spring cleaning?"

Ashley pulled her head out of her locker and looked to see who was saying such words.

"Sean."

He crossed his arms and arched an eyebrow as if it say 'you were expecting someone else?' and kept eye contact with her.

She sighed. "You know what's going on. The whole school knows," she replied bitterly.

"Well I don't give a fuck what the rest of them say…I wanna hear it from you."

"Why?"

"Because if people believed everything they heard, half the school would either be pregnant or have herpes by now," he smirked. "And they would all believe that I beat people," he said the last part quietly.

She just looked at him. Beat people? That was something new that she had not in fact heard before. "Who the hell is saying that you beat people?"

"Liberty. Oh and our little friends Paige, Ellie and Marco," he said with his lips pursed.

"Why would they do that? They've known you for years and Liberty is like known for saying things like that to make you stay with her. I've never seen you hurt anyone before in my life!"

Sean moved closer to her. "That's why I like you Ash. You don't believe the bullshit people say."

She crossed her arms and stared at him. "Do you?"

"Do I believe that you drugged that slut's drink? Or that it was meant for Paige?"

"Either or."

He shrugged. "Why don't you tell me what happened. And we'll take it from there."

She smiled briefly at him as she turned around to pick up her books. "Well I'd love to, but I'm kind of getting the boot," she said bitterly.

He silently took in her empty locker and all her belongings on the floor. "I can help," he said as he bent down and picked up an armful of books."

"Thanks," she said softly.

"Now…why don't we get some lunch. And you can tell me your side of this whole…thing," he said as together they started to walk down the hall. She paused briefly with the picture in her hands and then stopped at a trashcan and after a minute, let it slowly drift inside.

"Alright."

* * *

"El."

Ellie sighed and turned around. "What Toby?"

He smiled a small smile at her and shuffled his feet a little bit before looking back up at her. "I was thinking maybe we could talk?"

She snorted. "Isn't it hard to talk though when your tongue is in another girls mouth?" she cocked her head as if she didn't understand and this was a challenging question for him.

He looked down at the ground. "Look I'm sorry about that ok? But it was a one time thing. Ellie…I love you! We're all entitled to mess up every once in a while right?"

She just stared at him and opened her mouth to speak when all the sudden someone else called her name. She turned her head to see Craig coming at her but when he realized who she was with, he did an about face and hightailed in the opposite direction. She looked back at her ex and saw the sneer on his face.

"You're right. Everyone's entitled to make a few mistakes."

He smiled and reached out for her hand. "I'm so glad that you understand that! I promise you, it will never happen again ok El?"

She smiled at him and took his hand. "You're right. It won't. Because you were my mistake Toby. And shame on me for actually liking you. Why on earth do you think I'd want to get back with you?! Seriously! You're not even that cute, so there goes that incentive," she said rolling her eyes.

"Ellie, you don't need to be such a bitch," he said quietly.

She laughed at this. "I don't have the right to be a bitch? After I caught you with some slut at the mall? After you treat my best friend like shit? After you lie to me, not once, but repeatedly? Well you're right Tobe, I don't have that right. But I can do this," she finished her sentence as she slapped him across the face. "When I said don't talk to me, I meant don't talk to me," she finished coldly as she walked away.

"You don't know what you're missing!! I'm All-State baby!" he yelled at her retreating back. When she didn't turn around, he cursed loudly and kicked some grass as he himself turned to leave.

* * *

The blonde looked at the boy beside her like he had three heads. "Give it a shot?"

He sighed. "All I'm saying is see what happens. Why is that so bad?"

"Because I saw what happened! It came back Jay!!"

"It could be different this time! Why are you so…"

"Bitchy?" she fired at him.

"Stubborn," he shot back.

She crossed her arms and glared at him. "Well when it's your life that hangs in the balance I'll make sure to ask you the same thing ok? But for now, leave me and my life, alone! Manny and Jim were right; you could never understand anything about me," she snapped as she got out of the car and started to walk home.

"Emma! Come on! It's dark and you live five blocks away, get back in the car," he yelled at her.

"I like the night. It lets me be alone," she hurled back.

"You wanna be alone? Alone and lonely with your fucking cigarettes and your god damn pride? Fine," he squealed his tires as he pulled out leaving her there staring after him.

"He really left…" she muttered to herself. She was expecting some sort of fight, yeah, but him actually leaving? That was new. "Well fuck him anyway," she mumbled as she fished for her phone and dialed Jimmy's number.

* * *

"I don't know about this," Liberty said squirming around in her seat.

Paige just sighed and rolled her eyes. "Do you trust me?"

"Paige."

"Well then…stop!" she laughed. "I may not be an expert on how to make people beautiful, but it's not that hard Libby. Especially with you."

"Especially with me?" Liberty played with ends of her hair that were now curled and looked in the mirror. It didn't take long at all but where Liberty Van Zandt once sat was now a girl with beautiful hair, as opposed to her usual ponytail, makeup on her face, where she was always natural and contacts, where she never wore the things before in her life.

"Libby, I know that you have issues what with Sean and all…but you are. Besides, after being taught to wear this stuff by Ellie…I feel like I can now pass the torch to you," she smiled.

"Torch? Are we Greek here?"

Paige lightly hit her off the shoulder. "You know what I mean. Besides, a party could be just what you need to get your mind off him. We told the school and they said they would look into it. Just sit back and take some time for yourself now. What?" she asked as she noticed her friend staring at her.

"Been talking to Ms. Sauve lately?" she arched an eyebrow.

Paige blushed at the guidance counselors name. "Well she helped me you know…."

"No offense but my problem is a little bit different then ordinary depression."

"Yeah…I gathered that one," Paige replied with an eye roll. "Alright…c'est fini!"

Liberty just looked at her and she sighed. "You're done."

"Oh!! Well why didn't you just say that then?"

"Because I'm Paige…and I like being difficult," she shrugged. "Now come on, Ellie said by eight and we're late," she took her friends hand and hauled her to her feet.

* * *

"Pretty people party," Manny snorted.

"Wait…"

"Em, you can't be serious. We're not really gonna go…it's called a joke," Manny said looking at her like she was crazy.

"Well why not?"

"Umm…because we're not part of the pretty people with problem crowd? I mean I'm just taking a shot in the dark here."

Emma gave her friend a look and then put a hand on Jimmy's shoulder as he started to pass. "Let's go crash it. Besides a party means everyone can go. Let's go drink all their booze."

Manny looked at her suspiciously. "Sounds like my friend…but is it really?"

"Well how about I kick your ass and we can find out," Emma shot back tired of her friends dumping on her for hanging out with Jay.

Jimmy just laughed. "Yeah…that's Emma."

"Um…did someone invite you or something?" Toby asked as he opened the door to reveal the three on the steps.

"Um…didn't you get dumped the by the girl who lives here?" Emma mocked.

Toby just scowled at her and let her in. There were people everywhere inside, and most of them were inebriated. Manny just looked at everyone and then back at Emma as if to say 'you wanted to come here why?' but Emma just pushed through everyone and made it to the kitchen where she knew the alcohol would be.

"Emma!"

She looked up to see Ellie sitting on a counter with Craig and gave a little smile.

"I didn't think I'd see you…here," she laughed. "Doesn't seem like you're kind of place."

She shrugged with the beer in her hand. "I wanted to come see what all the talk is about."

Ellie just smiled a sincere smile at her. "Cool. Well I'll catch up with you alright?"

The blonde just looked at her. "Thanks Ellie," she said softly.

"For what?"

She shook her head. "For not treating me like I have a disease," she said catching the ironic statement after she said it.

"Why would I do that? You're human, I'm human. We're one in the same," she shrugged.

"You're alright Nash, you know that?" Emma smiled on the way out.

"Yeah…you too," Ellie said after her although sounding slightly confused.

* * *

"I don't know what I said to her…but now she hates me. So whatever," Jay took a gulp of his drink and rolled his eyes.

"What'd you say?"

He looked over to see Manny standing next to him and sighed. "I really don't feel like putting up with your shit tonight alright Santos? So do me a favor and spare me your psycho babble bullshit."

She gave him a dirty look. "Well thank for being a prick," she said conversationally. "But I was going to say is that Emma made it a point to come here tonight. And I'm guessing it has to do with you. So what did you say?"

"Nothing! None of your business," he corrected himself.

Manny looked at him. "Are you drunk already?"

He bugged his eyes out and stared back at her. "No…" he mocked.

She made a face and looked away. "So you're an ass all the time then? Well it's no wonder why my friend likes you then," she shot at him.

"Did like me. Did."

"I'm not a mind reader Hogart. Are you gonna tell me or am I going to have to get you drunk until you talk?"

"Get me drunk? Are you trying to take advantage of me?" he poked her lightly.

"Ugh. That would be Ashley's job wouldn't it? Now start fucking talking before I use my heel on your head."

He winced as though he could imagine that pain. "Alright, Jesus! All I said is that she at least consider chemo. And then she flipped out and got out of the car and ran away. Far…far….away," he finally finished.

Manny grabbed his arm and started dragging him outside. "We're gonna have a little chat."

"Woah, woah! What makes you think I want to talk to you?"

She gave him a look. "Because you like my best friend. Now shut the fuck up and follow me already."

He thought about this for a second but then gave up and followed her.

* * *

"Move, move, out of my way…"

Craig glanced up as two people appeared in the kitchen and as he visibly tensed up, Ellie turned to see who it was.

"Sean. Ashley. What are you doing here?"

"Well it's a party right? Isn't everyone invited to a party?" he cocked his head as if daring her to say no.

"Everyone that we know…and like," Craig retorted.

"Oh so you like that Santos girl?" Ashley fired.

"She's here with Emma. And yes, I like Emma. Anything else?" Ellie hopped off the counter and was now standing with her arms crossed across from her old best friend.

"Ellie…come on. We're friends!" Sean said throwing an arm around her.

She shrugged it off. "No. We're not," she said as she walked into the throng of people

* * *

a/n: huzzah!!!!!!!! so i haven't touched this story in a long time but i actually have it finished now!!! i went through a move up to massachusetts...and then i didn't have this file. and then i moved to college, where i'm now presently sitting on my top bunk when i should be sleeping. so feel special!!!! lol. i'll upload the rest once i get reviews. 3333-nikki 


	16. when it all falls apart

Chapter 16- When it all falls apart

"So she had chemo before?" Jay asked cocking his head like a cute little cocker spaniel.

Manny nodded her head as she took a drink of his beer that he had. He opened his mouth to object to the drinking of his beverage but when he saw her face he closed it.

"Well what happened?"

She sighed. "Most of her hair came out and then she went into remission but it came back apparently. And she doesn't want to live that life again."

"How long was she in remission?"

"Since we were young. Look, now you know. If you liked her, you would respect her decision. And you would go talk to her," she threw in after a minute.

He snorted. "I don't think she really wants to see me much. Actually no, she doesn't. I'm pretty damn sure."

"Riddle me this then oh wise one. Why did she make it a point to come here tonight then? She told us to stop the car and started making excuses. All of which just seem to come right back….to you."

Jay pointed at himself and she nodded and he smiled a little bit. "She likes me still?"

"You need to be hit. Hard. Over the head," was her response.

* * *

"Why are people staring at me?" Liberty whispered to Paige.

Paige grinned at her self-conscience friend. "You're hot Lib! They wanna know who you are!"

"You sound like an Ellie clone," Liberty snorted.

"Yeah well this clone is about to push you at that boy over there. So you can thank me later," she said as they walked by a cute guy with dark brown hair and Paige shoved her into him.

"Chuck?"

Paige turned around and smiled at that. Ellie was the only one to call her that, and she wasn't going to lie. She liked the idea that one of the most popular girls in school was like her best friend and had her own little nickname for her. And going out with Marco…did not hurt in the least.

"Hey El."

"Did you fix up your friend there?" she asked nodding towards Liberty.

Paige grinned and nodded. "Yeah I did. She needed it. It's ok right?"

"Duh! So what's goin on? Where's Marco?"

"I have no idea. He told me he was going to be here…"

* * *

"Don't close the door in my face," was the first thing out of his mouth.

Alex just sighed and looked at him, not saying a word.

"Look, I know that I made a mistake for trying to tell you how you should have done better with your…situation. But I'm sorry Alex."

"Trying to tell me what I should have done? Gavin, you told me that I'm horrible because I didn't tell you or Rick!! And that apparently I have no heart because I don't bother looking or worrying about her! That's a little more than trying to tell me what I should have done," she said as she glared at him.

He winced a little bit but didn't back down. "I was just…amazed I guess."

"Amazed? At the fact that I had a kid or gave it up?"

He shrugged, not looking at her before he started talking again. "Both. But what bothered me most was that you had one and didn't tell me," he said quietly.

She snorted. "Didn't tell you? What am I supposed to do, broadcast it to the world that I've had sex and accidentally popped out a kid? Sorry, I think that I missed that birthing class."

"Come on Alex. Don't be such-"

"A bitch?" she crossed her arms.

"I was said I was sorry. And I am, but there's nothing else I can really say. I never should have said anything about you needing to keep her. I should have respected your decision. And I do."

She just arched an eyebrow, but her arms weren't crossed anymore. "So…."

"Where are we now?"

She ducked her head, her jet black hair falling in her face. He reached out hesitantly and brushed it behind her ear.

"Alex…" he stepped closer to her and her breath caught in her throat as she looked up at him. He leaned in close and kissed her deeply yet simply at the same time.

"Wow…" she giggled a little bit softly.

He smiled softly and put his hands on her hair. "I'm sorry for what I did. But I can promise you that I will never do that again. Whatever you want to do, that's your thing. And I'll respect it."

She looked in his eyes and smiled as she felt the feeling of home deep in her chest. "I love you," she whispered without thinking. As soon as she realized what she said she clammed up and looked away from him.

"Alex."

She looked in vain at the sidewalk behind him but he put a hand on her chin and guided her eyes back to his.

"I know you do. And you're not alone," he smirked.

Her eyes grew wide but her mouth stayed closed. "I love you too Lex. I think I have for a while…I just didn't realize what was in front of me."

The girls eyes watered as she threw herself in his arms.

* * *

"So you're name is Liberty right?"

She turned around and saw Peter Stone behind her. Sure he wasn't as cute as say…Marco. But he was good looking and in her history class. She nodded as she thought about all this and he smiled.

"You wanna dance?" he had his hands in his back pockets.

She grinned. "Sure Peter. I'd love to," she said as she stepped towards him.

"Good. Because you're looking too good to be just sitting around talking to people."

"Oh yeah?" she cocked her head.

He smirked. "Oh yeah," he said as he twirled her around.

* * *

"Emma!"

Emma turned around and rolled her eyes when she saw who was calling for her. "What?" she snapped.

"Can we talk?"

"Didn't you already try to tell me how to live my life? No thanks, I'm fine," she turned back around ready to walk away when he grabbed her arm.

"Don't fucking touch me," she said lowly and he dropped it automatically.

"Emma I'm sorry," he said after a minute. "I didn't know about your life…before. I had no idea of what you went through!"

She gave him a look. "Does chemo sound like a fucking ride at a carnival for you buddy?"

"No but it does sound painful," he said quietly.

She cinched her jaw shut and made a face. "Jayson, listen to me. I have no intention of starting chemo again. If you think for a second that you are going to make me feel bad for leaving my friends and family, you can take a walk off a short pier ok? I'm through with listening to your shit about how I need to better myself and I don't have much time left so I should use it to my advantage. How I live my life is my business. And if it wasn't for some god damn project at school, you wouldn't have even fucking talked to me! So tell me, what more could you possibly have to say to me?" she glared at him.

"Nothing," he said staring right back at her as if it was a challenge.

"Then I guess we're done here," she said softly.

He was silent for a second and looked down at the floor. "Not quite," he said looking back up.

She arched an eyebrow at him and he crossed the floor to her and pulled her into his arms and pressed his lips to hers with a passion. Instantly she fought it, arms hitting at him and wiggling to get away. After a second she figured out she wasn't going to get away from him and sagged into him.

"What the fuck was that?!?!?!" she yelled at him.

He bit his lip and nodded. "You kissed me back," he said quietly.

She sighed and attempted to look away. "What is it with you and that phrase? God damn it!" she finished as she tried getting away from him again.

Jay released his bear hug on her but kept hold of her wrists as she took a step back.

"What is this, like handcuffs?" she asked in amusement.

"Well otherwise I'm getting this vibe you're going to run. And that's not happening."

She arched an eyebrow at him but he just started talking. "I know we wouldn't have talked Emma, I'm not naïve. But I do know that this year has been some of the most fun I've had in a long time, just stepping out and doing things I wouldn't usually do. And yes, that includes talking to you. But I'm not sorry. And I'm not sorry for trying to tell you that you need to do chemo. It's selfish of me but I don't give two fucks. I want you to be here…with me…for a while. So you can fight me and hit me and whatever the fuck it is you do…I'm not going anywhere. And I'll do whatever it takes for you to see that. I'm not some prick that you've dated before," he said looking directly into her eyes.

"Let me go," she whispered softly, tears starting to form.

"No. Say what it is you really feel inside," he urged her.

"I can't Jay! I just…can't," she replied as she got loose and walked away.

* * *

"Where have you been?" Paige asked her boyfriend as he stepped up next to her. He shrugged evasively and just put an arm around her waist.

"What's Sean and Ashley doing here?" he looked at Craig.

Craig looked behind him as if Marco was talking to someone else. "Dude, why the hell is everyone asking me!?"

"It was just a question…"

Craig in return rolled his eyes and sighed. "I'll say this. The two of them, can't be good."

Paige looked at him with a worried expression. "He won't try anything will he?"

"Oh what are the pretty people's problems tonight?" Jimmy sang out as he swung into the room.

"Brooks, what the hell?" Marco swatted his hand away from Paige's shoulder. "What are you doing at Ellie's party?"

"Emma wanted to come. Why, you got an issue with it? Or is it with her?"

Craig made a face. "Calm down. No one said they have a problem with Emma."

"I do."

The four people turned to see who said those fateful words and the three friends inwardly cringed. Ashley Kerwin challenging Jimmy Brooks would not end nicely.

"What that she didn't end up comatose after you fucking drugged her?"

"Uhh no. And that wasn't for her," Ashley said looking at Paige. Paige's mouth dropped open but before she could say anything, Ashley started back up again. "My problem is that she's here. She doesn't belong here. Just because she has Jay brainwashed, doesn't mean she can bring her fucking problems into this house. Her two little friends included," she said in a tone meaning she was implying Jimmy and Manny. Jimmy took a step up towards her and Paige could see that punches would be flying soon.

"What the fuck did you just say?" He fixed his steely eyes on her.

"Oh! And her little 'cancer' issue…what the fuck ever," she rolled her eyes.

All the sudden she flew into the table and people could see behind her that Jay stood there with Emma behind him with eyes wide.

"Did you just push me?" she asked incredulously.

Jay just stood his ground. "Yeah, that'd be me. Where the fuck do you get off saying shit about her? Like you fucking know her?? Or wait, better yet…that you're better than her? And I swear to God if you say anything about either her condition or the fact that I'm 'brainwashed', I won't be responsible for what I do," he said blue eyes storming.

"Are you threatening me?" Ashley asked amused.

Jay pursed his lips as though he was thinking about it and then nodded. "Yeah, I guess I am. And whatever I don't do, I'm sure it's going to be nothing next to Jimmy," he finished looking at the boy for the first time. Jimmy, himself, was wearing a surprised expression at Jay just said.

Emma pushed past Jay and looked at Ashley. "I may…have issues with my health but you have no fucking right to just say it like it's about the god damn weather. I don't know what the fuck your deal is me…or people in general, but you need to fucking drop dead alright?" she asked as she pushed Ashley against the table like Jay had just done.

"And your words are scarring me. Whatever little girl, I don't have time for this. Or for any one of you fake shitheads," she said, her voice dripping with disdain as she tried to push past the people in the kitchen.

"Oh I think you can make time," Marco growled looking at his former friend like he was going to lynch her right then and there.

"Sean!! What the hell are you doing?" a yell came from the other room. Paige and Marco swung around to look just in time to see Sean swing at Peter, who Liberty had been dancing with. Marco grabbed Paige by the wrist and followed the people into the other room, leaving Ashley with Jay and Emma.

"Looks like you'll have to fight your own battles now Nelson. Shame since Jay has been doing it all for you. But who knows, maybe I wont' be the one to drop dead. Maybe you will," she sneered.

Emma raised a hand to her face and slapped her hard. "If you speak to me or about me again, I swear to God it'll be the last thing you do," she said through clenched teeth.

Ashley glared at the girl and held her face gingerly where Emma slapped her. "I'm not afraid of you. You're just-"

"You know what? Shut the fuck up. You're fake, your words are fake and we have better things to do than sit here and look at this pathetic fuck up of a person," Jay spat out as he pulled Emma into the living room where all the commotion was.

* * *

"Sean stop it!!!!" Liberty shrieked as he pushed Peter against a wall.

He shot a look over to Liberty. "What were you doing with him Lib? Huh?? Cheating on me? Is that you were doing with my girl?" he asked getting in Peter's face.

"We're not together Sean! We haven't been for three months!" She yelled trying to pull them apart.

"I was just dancing with her…" Peter was trying to say before Liberty shut him up.

"I know you have this warped vision in your head that we're together but we're not. We haven't been for a while. And I have no intention of even entertaining the idea of looking at you again in my life. So yes, I was dancing with Peter. Wait…why the hell am I even bothering to explain myself to you?" she asked throwing her hands up in the air. "I owe you nothing," she snapped at him.

He grabbed her arm as she turned to walk away, oblivious to the crowd that had gathered. "I made you who you are Liberty! You think you can just walk away from me again, I'll make you regret it. Again," he smirked.

Her eyes grew wide but she also knew in her head that if she got him to confess to beating her that she'd be safe. "Oh like the time you thought I was cheating on you with JT and I had to wear long sleeves the next day?" she cocked her head.

"Worse than that. Worse than anything. You're not leaving me Liberty Van Zandt. You're mine."

"She's not your property," Paige spoke up walking into the circle. "You have no right to talk to her like that. She's a woman. One you like to hit. So get the fuck away from her before I call the cops," she threatened her voice wavering.

"You think I hit her!? Who the hell told you that?" he asked with a surprised expression.

"She did," Marco spoke up as he walked up beside Paige.

He made a noise and looked back at Liberty who was talking to Peter off in a corner. "She's a fucking liar. Alright, I've never hit a girl in my life. Even if she is a fucking slut like that," he spit in her direction.

"She showed us her arms Sean. She showed us your fingerprints on her neck. You want to try telling us again that you've never touched her?" Ellie cocked her head at him.

"Ellie! Come on, are you serious?? You've known me forever. I don't know what the hell is going on with all of you but you're all fucked in the head," he said turning to leave.

"What's fucked is what you were just doing in front of everyone. We don't need anymore proof than what we have," Craig said from his other side.

Sean's face paled as he finally looked around and saw most of the party goers looking at him with either surprise, shock or disgust on their face. They had him now, he realized that.

"I think you should go now," Ellie said softly as she walked up beside him and laid a hand gently on his arm.

He shrugged her off. "I don't need you to tell me what to do El. I know when I'm not wanted."

"You really did it this time you know?" she replied looking at him with hurt eyes. "There's no taking this back."

He looked down at the ground as he thought about this and then looked around at all the people again, at Liberty standing next to Peter, at all his old friends and nodded. "I know," he whispered as he bent down and kissed Ellie on the cheek. "You were always my favorite," he said as he turned to leave.

Tears came from her eyes and as he walked out she walked slowly into the kitchen and leaned on the counter and cried.


	17. aftermath

Chapter 17- Aftermath

Two months later

"Hey Lib," Paige smiled as she passed her in the hall.

Liberty tossed her a smile in return and then turned her attention back to Peter. "So seven tonight?"

"I'll see you then," he smirked as he kissed her and then walked away to his class. Liberty sighed as she sank against the lockers. Two months ago, she never would have thought this possible. She was in a skirt first off, something that Sean never would have allowed. Because you know, if she wore one that meant that she was trying to attract other men and she might as well just be standing on a corner. After receiving that comment several times over, she stopped wearing them altogether. Peter on the other hand, whistled at her as she walked by in it. She grinned and undoubtedly turned a beautiful shade of red…or purple. It had been two months since Sean just walked away. After confessing like he did at that party, he just picked up and left. Nobody was surprised to see him go…except Liberty. She had thought for sure that he would have stayed around and tried to fight or raise hell. But instead two days later, he was gone. Apparently taking Ashley with him; which made everyone happy.

"Well you look happy."

She sighed and turned her head to see Alex slumped down next to her.

"Likewise."

Alex grinned self consciously and tucked her hair behind her ears.

"Life is weird," was all she said before she got up and walked towards Gavin who was getting out of class. The two exchanged a kiss and then interlocked hands as they walked down the hallway together.

* * *

"I am not wearing that."

"It could be fun…" her friend tried to persuade her.

Emma gave her a look and the girl back down.

"I'm just saying Em…"

"Yeah I know what you're saying Manny. But I would also like to point out that two months ago, you thought I was high for liking the boy. Now you're dressing me up like Barbie."

Manny went and sat on the bed. "Emma. He makes you happy. He knows that I will hurt him if he chooses to hurt you. So I'm not afraid. Plus he somehow got Jimmy off his back. So this boy can obviously work miracles. I'm just saying…wearing another color besides black would be good for you."

"I don't see you prancing around in a yellow sundress," Emma crossed her arms sarcastically.

"That's because it's hidden in my closet behind a secret door," Manny shot back. "I do it on my own time. So it doesn't count."

"Wearing purple underwear doesn't count either you know."

Manny glared at her. "Yes it does. And yours sweetheart is beige. So move and let me go through your closet or I will be forced to call some fucking preppy person and then I'll get bitchy. And you really don't want that."

Emma grumbled but move to let her to her closet where Manny promptly pulled out a red tank top. "What the fuck is this?! You've been holding out on me Emma Nelson!" She tossed her the tank top with a knee length black skirt.

"A skirt? Who died?" Emma cocked an eyebrow.

"No one. But you will if you don't play nice."

"You know, I still don't understand why you're trying to make me over here. Jay knows what I look like. The whole school knows what I look like. They don't care. And up until now, you didn't either," Emma pointed out as she pulled the tank top over her head.

"Yeah well you're shocking people by going out with Jay Hogart, homecoming king. So let's give them all heart attacks and have you wear something with colors."

"So you just want to kill people with shock," she stated.

"Pretty much," Manny nodded.

Emma shook her head and smirked as a knock came at the door.

"Woah. A skirt?"

The two girls looked up to see Jay standing there with a grin on his face.

"Oh. And for that," Manny pointed at his face with a smirk.

"It's Manny's fault."

"Manny. Dress her every god damn day then," Jay joked as he crossed over and kissed his girlfriend.

"I hate you. Told you that one lately?" she glared at him.

"I love you too sweetheart."

Manny just rolled her eyes and left the room. Jay took a long look at Emma and smiled.

"You look gorgeous," he said softly.

"I hate this," she mumbled. "I don't understand why everyone's trying to make me into something I'm not. You like me, that's enough. I don't care about anyone else."

He shrugged as he turned to leave the room as Manny had done. They decided to take the first period that morning and sleep in…however now it was time to go.

"Emma Nelson, if you are changing so help me God!!" Manny called up the stairs.

Jay stopped at the door. "Wait. Are you? Because I can wait you know…"

She threw the first thing she picked up at him…which happened to be a bra. He caught it and grinned and she threw her hands up. She started walking towards him but stopped in the middle of the room and put a hand to her head.

"Em?"

She looked at him confused for a second and then started to fall.

"Emma!" he yelled as he ran to catch her. "Manny!!"

Two seconds later the girl pounded upstairs and into her room to find Emma laying on the floor in Jay's arm unconscious.

"Oh my God," she whimpered.

"Go call the doctor," Jay ordered as he shook her gently.

* * *

a/n: only more chapter left!!! review review review!!!!!! and easter baskets will come in the mail for y'all tee hee -nikki 


	18. picking up where we left off

Chapter 18-Picking up where we left off

Emma's eyes cracked open and then shut again as the bright light streamed through the windows. Where was she? She turned her head to see Jay sleeping in a chair beside her and noticed the tube going down her arm connected to the needle in her hand. She shifted slightly and Jay stirred.

"Jay?" she asked cautiously.

He opened his eyes slowly at that point. "You're awake." He said it as a statement but there was a small underlying questioning tone as well.

"Where am I?"

He looked down and sighed. "Emma…there was a wreck."

"What? When?"

"Two months ago."

She looked around confused. "Two months ago? What are you talking about??"

He pursed his lips and took off his hat, running a hand through his hair. "We were coming back from the Dot. Ashley and Toby were in the other one. They ran a stop sign…and hit us as we were driving across the road."

She attempted to sit up so she could process this better but Jay jumped up and gently pushed her back down.

"Doctor said you need to lie down for a while. But they hit us…and pushed us into a tree. It was on your side of the car Emma."

"I was in an accident…"

He nodded. "You've been here for two months now babe," he said softly.

"In…a coma?" she finally understood.

He nodded.

"Oh my God. I was in a coma for two months…." She looked away, the information sending her reeling.

He just looked at her silently, his eyes saying all he wanted to. "Were you scared?" she asked softly.

He shook his head. "Not of the crash. I was shitting my pants when you wouldn't wake up though. I thought you were dead Emma…" he sighed.

She smiled gently and took his hand in his. "I love you Jay," she said clearly and looking straight at him.

He stared at her. "I…ummm….Emma. You know I like you, for some fucking reason I do. But…you're with Peter," he said softly, taking his hand away and ducking his head.

She closed her eyes and thought. She was with Peter? But why was Jay the one that kept popping up in her head? Why did it make sense for Jay to be sitting there next to her bed? And if she was with Peter….why was she so disappointed?

"Peter…"

"Yeah. For a while now. We're just friends," he said finally venturing a look up at her face again.

Emma closed her eyes and turned her head away for a minute before turning back to him. "No."

"No?" he cocked his head.

"No. Jay, for some reason when I was apparently in this coma…you were the one I kept seeing. Not Peter, not anyone. You. And when you just told me this…I just got this….feeling in my chest…" she put a hand over her chest area as if to emphasize her point.

"What are you trying to say? That you want to ditch Stone for me?" he asked in an amused tone.

"No! Wait, yes!!" she sighed. "I don't know. All I know is that you're the one I couldn't stop thinking about. And you're the one I wanted to be beside me when I woke up."

"You didn't realize what was going-"

"I know. That's the point," she said looking at him pointedly.

He sat down and shook his hair. "I can't do this right now Emma…"

"Why not?"

He looked at her as if she was high. "Because it's something you would never do to someone! This isn't like you Emma. And I don't know if I can go along with it."

"Yes you can. You always do, you're Jay. You don't give a fuck what anyone thinks. You do this all the time!" her voice had took on a different tone now…somewhat close to….pleading?

Jay got up and started to pace the room and opened his mouth to speak when a knock sounded at the door. "Knock knock."

Jay rolled his eyes and started to walk out of the room.

"Jay!"

He shook his head and looked at her. "I'll just see you later."

Emma closed her eyes and leaned back against the pillow, only opening them when she realized that Peter was by her side.

"Hey sweetie. How long ago did you wake up?" he smoothed back her hair as he asked this question.

She shrugged. "I have no idea. Jay was sleeping…"

* * *

"Who're you?"

The girl looked up as she sat uncomfortably on the edge of a plastic seat. "I'm Autumn," she replied as she cleared her throat. "I'm here with Peter."

Jay stopped digging around for his cigarettes and looked at her. "Here with Peter. As a date?"

She shrugged. "Well we were going to get some dinner but he said he had to swing by here and see a friend first."

Jay's eyes bulged out of his head and he turned and punched the wall, much to everyone's surprise, especially Autumn's.

"Are you ok?" she asked hesitantly as she approached him fearfully.

He ignored her and slammed the door to Emma's room open and advanced towards Peter.

"Get the fuck out of this room Stone before I'm forced to fucking hurt you. Emma…we have to talk," he said staring down Peter.

* * *

a/n: so that's it!!! this story is fini!!! and i got the idea from an episode of One Tree Hill i saw a while back where everything changes up. thank you guys so much for sticking with me and reviewing it and liking it!!! i might be posting one or two up soon, one with jay and paige and one with paige as a central character. and feel free to check out my boy meets world stories as well (nothing like some serious pimping goin on here right?? lol) but you guys are amazing. i'll be trying to update "i will buy you a new life" as soon as i can but it's kind of hard since i'm doing such long chapters for a while. much love!!!!!! -nikki- 


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